I’ve found myself lately explaining to s-types I play with that I have needs as a Dom too and “using me however you want” isn’t always what will fill my cup. Granted, I am a dom leaning-switch, but I they often seem surprised that when I talk about how much responsibility being a dom is when they say I can use them, but then also put me in charge of their pleasure, and mine. I try to explain that submission/being submisssive can be more than just giving up control, and telling me I can do whatever I want.

I wish more subs knew that there are many styles of dominance, D-types can have a multitude of different needs, and subs have a responsibility to figure out my needs/nuances of my D-style in the same way I will try to figure out their needs/nuances of submission.