The clock struck 9pm. I opened my eyes and looked at the ceiling, wondering where I had been drifting. So I decided to get up and go get the black rope I had hidden deep in my closet.

The room was dimly lit, surrounded by four walls. The sound of passing cars and sometimes someone's voice in the distance, I couldn't make out what they were saying. I quietly enjoyed my surroundings with my eyes and ears. Then I picked up the rope and started tying myself up. It wasn't a "healing" or meditative process. In front of me was a tiny laptop screen showing a lovely lady showing me how to tie up the upper body in basic ways. I struggled to lean back and forth. My hands reached here, poked there, reached there. After a while of struggling with the rope and the lovely sister's voice still gently guiding me on how to tie it, I didn't have enough rope to continue.

The room was still dimly lit, surrounded by four walls. I reached out to close my laptop. The sound of passing vehicles still echoed in the air, and the occasional sound of people still appeared, and I couldn't tell who they were. I lay there, my upper body tied, silently breathing under the pressure of the rope. My thoughts began to be filled with a little Tequila, sweet and intoxicating. I let myself enter another dimension - a dimension that I had created myself.

There was no longer a dark room, no walls. Around me began to hum the melody of my favorite music. A comfortable space, with green grass below and clear sky above, as if I had entered a Ghibli movie with a wonderful scene that the talented artist Miyazaki Hayao had embellished. I still appeared there with the clumsy rope that I had made myself, but it felt so peaceful. I gradually rearranged my problems, made some small plans to write down later. And I also encouraged myself, "Good job".

Strange, right? A person, in a small, dark, cramped room, and was tied by a jet-black rope. But that person was incredibly free. That person was me now, a me who felt so safe; a me who was calm and gentle with myself, completely different from me in front of everyone; a me who was so beautiful under the imprint of that rope.

I finally sat up, freed myself from the rope, and at the same time began to put myself into other unintentional ropes of myself and society. The night began to get longer.