I posted a thread not too long ago about chasing validation thru submissiveness that was probably a bit too cryptic. I was trying to understand the sub's state of mind when the Dom was pushing them to do things beyond reasonable limits.

Essentially, I have a very casual acquaintance who is a Dom and sees a few subs. One in particular he has a fixation for, but she's also married and its questionable whether she's cheating or ENM and her husband knows about it (a big part of why I tend to avoid married subs). They dated like 20 years ago, and he always saw her as "the one that got away". They started a D/s dynamic maybe 3 years ago, and have been meeting up a few times a year. He always makes a point of recording their meetups - he's very...porn addicted. So the style is basically copy/paste of a lot of basic porn tropes. In particular, he's very turned on by the whole bull/cheating aspect

A couple days ago, he and I were hanging out with a few others and he proudly showed us a video he shot with her last week. Basically, he had done a casting couch roleplay with her, but more importantly, she explicitly mentioned in the video that she was both married and that her husband didn't know she was there. Further, they end up removing the condom they started out using in the video and fucking raw (that's a big part of his kink - specifically breaking that boundary).

Now, this sub like I said is married, with kids, and is a white collar professional. This video being released would almost certainly cause severe career damage as well as social fallout for her family. I was not only kinda grossed out about the cheating kink (I am vocal about my extreme dislike of cuckholding having been the "BBC" for over a dozen couples in that lifestyle), but I got also some extreme red flags from this whole situation. Like, what is the value of creating this kind of video at all, given the stakes here? There's no innocent of positive intent behind creating this, right? What kind of dependency would drive a sub to consent to this kind of thing that could easily destroy her life? Am I being crazy or is there something fucked up that's happening?