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Hello! I'm not really new to the scene so I guess I should know this already but I've been doing my best to educate myself on different things and vetting has always been kinda confusing for me. In everything that I look at it's always "ask someone what you want to know and try to see if they're a good person" but I don't know what I want to know. Does that make sense? Like, of course I want to know if you're clean or if you have any current partners or relationships or how active you are locally, but other than that I have no idea. Of course I should get to know them as a person but how much should I know? If I'm just vetting someone I want to 'play/scene' with, do I need to know everything about them? How much information should I be willing to give up? Of course I know when I'm being honest but how do I know when they are? Are there any obvious red flags that scream LIAR or something? How much time should I be willing to put into this? Am I supposed to only vet one person? How long after vetting am I supposed to be willing to meet? Can I meet someone while still vetting them? How far am I supposed to go to prove that I'm not lying? Can I be myself or am I supposed to dial it down? Sorry if this sounds like crazy ramblings or beginner type questions. I did have problems in the past that put me off for a while but I'm try to put myself out there more. I really didn't want a relationship/partner for a long time because I was scared but I think I'm ready to slowly try to dip my toes in the water. If you have any reading/video recommendations I'm open to that too. I want to be able to make sure that I really do it right this time and that I do everything I can to protect and prepare myself so please help. Even if it's mean. I just need to not feel like an idiot, thank you in advance.
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