Anyone else find themselves fantasizing not about the act, but the after care sometimes?

Like I think it really feels like a box is being checked off by being the one to make it all better after the event.

Even if you’re the one who inflicted it, so how you’re the “good guy” by kissing the pain away, rubbing the sore spot.

Giving love after.

Like honestly I can only think of it like this screwed up heroes image. Like dude, I’m the one who did it to you, I’m not saving anyone here.

And yet here I am fantasizing about holding her close after the fact.

Like we don’t even have to do the pain part to be here, and yet that’s not going to stop happening.