I’ve started a Femdom dynamic with a woman who identifies as a switch. Her Dom (whom I’ve never met) is starting to step into the dynamic between She and I. By that I mean he is trying to tell me things that I may not do when She and I are together. (I can respect that he makes rules for Her to follow, and I will of course follow Her instructions, but I don’t feel any reason that I should take direction from him)

I don’t want to cause any problems in their dynamic, but at the same time, I never agreed to be his sub (grandsub?) I’m going back and forth between three options - ignoring his messages,

• replying to him that he can dictate to Her as their dynamic calls for, but he’s not my Dom, or

• speaking to Her about how he is making me uncomfortable.

Anyone have any advice they’d like to share?