I love the kink community, but, just like any community, it does have assholes in it.

I am really tired of having to deal with so many stupid people to have an experience that is 100% fulfilling. I have done only a handful of scenes, and I'm still friends with only one of the people I did a scene with (we don't play any more because we just aren't that compatible kink-wise, but on a personal level we're super close and they're a fantastic friend).

With most of the scenes, it was mostly me going along with stuff to see what I liked and didn't like, and it did help me figure *some* of it out, but it wasn't particularly fulfilling beyond the instant gratification of it.

I'm really tired of people talking down to me because I'm new and young, and to have random labels pushed onto me just because of one anecdote I say during the talking stage. I've been called a brat more than once for talking back to a person saying something dumb. People talk to me like I have just found out what sex is. I have tons of anecdotes of people telling me stupid shit, but I don't want to make this post super long.

I have met some kinky people who seem pretty cool, but it took me like two years of being as active as I can in the community, and I didn't even meet them in a kinky space. I won't assume they may want to do a scene with me because I don't know them that well as we've only met a couple months ago.

I want to gain more experience in doing kink, and I should aim for quality over quantity, but there are so many idiots I have to deal with. It feels like I'm lowkey doomed to solo play forever because I can't afford to drop 100$ for classes and the events in my area are scarce. I can't afford to move either.