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Followup on the unusual kink discussion - a graph of the popularity of sexual fetishes
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There's a wonderful lady named Aella that conducts surveys usually related to sex topics, she has a huge dataset on sexual fetishes, and out of that published this lovely chart mapping 250 fetishes by their popularity, tabooness, and gender ratio. Lots of it lines up with my own assumptions/society's assumptions about kinks/fetishes, and some of it was unexpected to me.

When you're looking at it, keep in mind the y axis (up down, fetish popularity) is logarithmic.

No survey is perfect, but her post about the chart has some links to her methodology, etc if you want to learn more.

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In my experience while many male sadists can hit harder (on average) with impact play, in every single other way female sadists are far more extreme - and far more effective - in their sadism. I'm not saying that men can't be mean or very fun sadists to play with but the way women invest in it and relish it is just different and usually carries a much more intense energy.

Also women will not hesitate a bit when they get permission to go wild; men tend to be a bit more timid at the start and be easier. In this way it's kinda like men tend to not want to risk breaking their toy or worry about you being too fragile while other women know you're not gonna break and don't assume you're fragile and so have no timidity when approaching their sadism. That lack of (unwarranted) concern really makes it hit differently, in a very fun way.

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No, not at all.

There's a lot of surveys specifically about youth sexual attitudes and interests; just because someone is under 18 doesn't mean they don't experience desires or fantasies. It also doesn't mean that discussing that with them and understanding their perspective isn't useful (both for developing educational materials for people in their age group and for understanding how sexuality develops among people).

There's also the fact that with any international survey "legal adult" gets a lot more nebulous. Even in the US Alabama doesn't consider someone a legal adult until 19, while they are emancipated federally at 18 (this includes banning 19 year olds from porn, strip clubs, adults only concerts, and sex shops). Then there are the European and Asian nations which emancipate anywhere between 16 and 20; some which don't emancipate women at the same age as men - if at all.

That's why I mentioned people aged 16-22 specifically; a 19 or 20 year old being interested in a 16 year old isn't comfortable to think about, but in an area where you're emancipated at 16 it's not extremely inappropriate either. Similar feelings to a 22 year old and someone who is 17.

Even further I was in university at 22 and had friends who started Uni at 16. I also dated a couple 18 year olds briefly when I was 21/22: Because we were in the same classes, similar majors, and had similar social circles.

I'm not saying all this to exempt the skeeviness of the fact that clearly a LOT of (mostly men, but definitely a few women as well) are attracted to people in the teen & young teen demographic while being fully developed whole-ass adults 😑😵‍💫🤢 but just to point out that the people who tend to respond to surveys - especially sexual surveys - tend to skew younger and have an extreme bias towards university aged people we should take that into account when looking at the age related data.

Ultimately I really like that they had the attention to detail to break up the ages by (older) "teen" - ephebophilia, (younger) "teen" - hebephilia, "child" - paedophilia, and "infant" - infantophilia. It allows for exactly this nuance to float to the top. Especially since ephebophilia is actually a healthy condition of people who are in the 14-19 age group. That is to say: it's good for teenagers to prefer other teens over young children or fully grown adults.

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Well it's people into the fantasy of animal related things. A large part of that comes from the "perversion" perception of it. Being embarrassed turns a lot of people on and those things are really extremely abhorrent - but also aren't things that people often do or are exposed to - so they're very easily used for fantasy fodder. It's the same idea as "Harry Potter," most people who are really into HP don't want to be child soldiers fighting a Neo Nazi cult watching their closest friends and family die in the most horrific ways that they could imagine while they are permanently warped and twisted by horrific trauma before their life even really got started. At the same time: as a fantasy it's pretty exciting. The fact that it's so disconnected from the average reader's real life or things they'll ever likely experience is WHY it's something they can be excited by without fear of it actually happening.

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It should be noted that since they all had a very high male bias that also means that of that population only a tiny fraction (like within the margin of error for sure) were women. That category of stuff is 100% a male dominated thing; with the seeming exception of teenagers, but we also don't know how many of the respondents were 16-22 which would be the age where dating someone under 20 is pretty normal. That probably skewed that result a fair bit.

I love how this chart pretty much matches my experience in the adult & sex industries perfectly. It also really shows how common a lot of these fantasies are, and how many of them are dominated by women.

If I estimated right it's about 65% of the kinks that are feminine dominated, and of those remaining only about 15% are "strongly" male dominated. At the same time women strongly dominate about 20% of the fetishes. On top of this the ratio is about 60/40 towards men in the "more accepted" fetishes and then goes all the way to about 70/30 towards women the other way as you get more "taboo" or "extreme."

It's kinda sad that both trans men and trans women are generally seen as sexually desirable primarily by women though.

I also love how all of the super wild gorey, bloody; body fluid, torture, sadism focused, and extreme masochism based fetishes are all both strongly dominated by women and are all between 7% and 20% of the population. Like, extreme sadomasochism showing up as a kink/fetish for about 16% of women is a BIG thing! As is the fact that women also dominate the deeply psychological fetishes like humiliation, objectification, SA, and power play; with all of them being around 15% frequency at the minimum.

Based on how the chart works it also means that a "7%" with a high feminine bias looks closer to "15% of women," so some of the ones that were 20% with a high feminine bias would likely be close to 30% to 40% of women.

Even with the high error bars it really shows how diverse and intense feminine sexuality is. Also that when it comes to the most extreme and most twisted fantasies it's probably gonna be a majority female audience (with the exception of kids, which I am also very thankful for...).

Super cool!

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