Hiiii! This is more of a lighthearted discussion post. I’ve been on the outskirts of the scene for a little bit now. I also have experience being on the outskirts of the rave scene for a while. So now I’ve mixed my two interests!

This all started with local sex parties. I noted that my friends who hosted would use colored solo cups and silicone wristbands to let people nonverbally indicate their level of interest in getting approached (green = go ahead, yellow = ask first, red = do not approach, all with the understanding that no still means no). Those are a great idea, but I noticed that silicone wristbands can run a little pricey in bulk and solo cups can get set down and forgotten. Then I realized, you can buy hundreds of pony beads and a spool of cord for under $10. LIGHTBULB!

Thus, consent kandi were born and have been a huge hit at my friends’ parties. They’re a little more involved than just setting out a pile of wristbands, but a few dozen single-color beaded bracelets are pretty easy to crank out with a few buddies and a good movie or two.

Anyways, I’m looking to branch out. What if you were interested in trying certain kinks and wanted to nonverbally flag that to partners? Kind of like the hanky code, but a little less subtle and a little easier to show off when naked. I’ve made a few “kink” kandi as a test run, and those have also really popped off. They’re one to three colors (chosen somewhat arbitrarily, lol) and have a word or phrase that fits the kink. Suitable conversation starters, while also being versatile enough to wear a dozen different kinks at once.

So, the point of this post is twofold. One, to spread the word of a fun and useful craft I’ve picked up that applies well to NSFW scenes like BDSM parties. Two, I need some more ideas. There are a ton of kinks out there, and while I try to cover my bases with the more mainstream stuff, I can only make so many variations of “SPANK ME” ”PADDLE ME” “FLOG ME” “TORTURE ME” and so on. I’d love some more good phrases to make kink-themed kandi out of, whether they’re direct (the aforementioned “SPANK ME”) or a little silly (my “OH YES DADDY” DDLG ones have been a popular choice).