So I was decently interested in bdsm for quite a while, but only just recently taking out my feelers and sexting online (will deff start going to munches from prob next month), getting a feel of it and I am not sure if some of the things that turn me on os sadism. I am preyy sure I would define myself primarly using pleasure and service- I want to play with someone and let the cum with pleasure from either having control over me or me telling them exactly what to do and sexting out eroticas with them, trying to make sure quite a few of their kinks get their time in the limelight.

And one thing that I came across was women wanting to be humiliated, used and perhaps even hit in a scene. I do find that just knowing how much I can get them off from being a bit more cruel and mean, standoffish just brings me into another frame of mind where I decide for them and make sure to have them meet all the needs I want, "forcing" them to play out their fantasy and be spanked, hit or humiliated that I just don't do or enjoy outside of that. Hearing/imagining them whimper, scream and moan from the delight they get from that pain sure helps me get hard. So I am kinda confused and would love to talk about this.

Also all you sadists / masochists out there: what is it that you enjoy the most from it? What is your favourite way to play?

Edit for a bit of clarification and since this just occured to me: I do understand sadism as deriving pleasure from the act itself in a way, and as such am really confused if what I feel comes under being a sadist. I also wanted to add that in a way I feel not quite me, I feel like I in a way put on a version of myself, dial up some traits I know the other finds desireable, degrade and tell how much I'd use thier bodies when somebody gets me into a dom mood, so is that domspace? This feeling of being in a way more uninhibited version of yourself, but also way more focues on a few key characteristics that paint a totally differebt picture of you then what usually happens irl.