I've noticed, both in my local kink community and in myself, how often when people become more emotionally intimate, their kinkiness with each other begins to drop off. With myself, I find myself... uninterested(?) in engaging in kink with my partner, despite knowing their kinks and our respective kinks overlapping fairly significantly.

I just feel... no desire to engage in our mutual kinks with my live-in partner. The idea of exploring them with other people outside the relationship definitely instills a feeling of excitement in me, but with them I feel I've become very vanilla.

Have any other couples experienced this? I feel like this isn't an uncommon thing, but I don't even know where to begin the conversation. I'm not necessarily seeking to correct this because I'm not sure there's necessarily anything that needs correction -- we're poly so they are able to get their kink on with other people. But I can't shake this feeling like I'm lacking or dropping the ball or whatever, despite their assurances to the contrary.

Thoughts? Thanks in advance.