Hi,

So I would appreciate if anybody here could give me advices, opinions, any two cents in you pocket, about my bratty "problem" =p

So me (31M) and my partner (30F), we're switching for some time now. Now when I'm topping, I now she's very sensible to pain and more turned on by other things like verbal or situational humiliations. So I dial the corporal unishment to a minimum she enjoys.

But whenever I'm the sub and she domming, she's equaly reticent to inflict pain on me. We talk about it, I really explain and reassure her that i want to hurt, I crave for *all* of my cheeks to burn dearly afterward... :3 I mean, I'm kind of a brat submissive, I actually seek that moment where I don't feel I got off easy of my teasing and disobedience.

Now, switching is a sexual hobby of ours, but its a fragment of our common life, we're first and foremost a couple, we're vanilla in many aspects, except for our kinks... And she does express that it's hard for her to inflict pain on me because... well she loves me, and instinctively doesn't want to hurt me for real.

I also suspect that she projects her own distaste for pain on me. And it's hard to convey to her that not only I can take more, but I really crave it...

I wonder if I should let go of that need, if it's too much for her to do to me. I do get off on other abuses as well, I can tank it.

But its something I want, so I wonder if there's ways to get her there, explain or reassure better so that she'd be comfortable cranking it up.

I don't want to put any pressure on it, it's not a problem and it would taste wrong if she didn't enjoy doing it. But before I make her double up on other punishments, I'd take advices on how to try and get us there !

Many thanks to you all,

E.