I mean I'm sure this question has been asked a thousand times but, I've been on a journey of self discovery and am confident in what I am looking for etc but the hard part comes now of locating a safe partner to explore and learn with.

Ive tried the most obvious fetlife and perhaps it's just a local issue for me but everyone on that site seems to genuinely give me the ick, even when I try to find a not so overtly sexual gathering (there's a munch that's trying to form nearish me) I can't help but browse the attendees list and it's like 90 percent people I don't particularly wish to associate with. I guess i just tough it out and hope to connect with the other 1 in 10 who seem like rational individuals but like it's just generally kind of off putting.

Past that I've explored some discords met some very lovely people but this doesn't help me connect with someone irl so it's fun but not what I'm seeking either.

In short is there anywhere else I can really be looking besides posting reddit personals, ideally something more interested in establishing relationships and mutual discussions and not just flings and hookups.

I don't know thanks for listening and any serious responses are appreciated wish you all the best ♡

-Kyan