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For a long time, I was able to suppress my desire to get CNC raped (honestly without CNC too), to cry from genuine fear, to want my partner to be sadistic and evil. I want them to physically hurt me to the point the pain / scars won’t heal until way later. I have a sweet boyfriend and I love him. He does satisfy me but …I need more. And I feel guilty that I do. He’s so sweet but I need him sadistic. He can’t do that. I don’t want to break up with him for this dumb reason but I feel like I’m going crazy. How do I teach someone to be like this? I can’t right?
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- 22 hours ago
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