Ok, this may be a bit long but I’m struggling with how I feel about this situation and could really use some third party perspective.

I am very new to the scene; my dom is the first one I’ve played with irl. We had an amazing session the other day with lovely aftercare and I left feeling incredible. Unrelatedly, a few days later I posted a picture on fet from an older play session. He texted me and said maybe I’d like to post a pic from our recent session and sent a picture he’d taken.

I didn’t know he’d taken any at the time. I was really quite taken aback, and when I told him I wasn’t sure how I felt about that he got pretty defensive. We went back and forth a bit and I was trying to explain my position. He deleted them and said that since they were gone that I had nothing to worry about.

But I specifically said that I just needed a moment to process how I felt about the fact that I’d had pictures taken of me of which I was unaware and it felt surprising to see them. There was video as well. I do trust that he wouldn’t share them publicly but it just felt strange to see these images that I didn’t know were being taken, especially in such an intimate setting.

I wasn’t even really upset per se, it was more of a paused moment where I wasn’t sure what I felt. He felt that my response was negative (or at least not positive and excited to see the images of our time together) so he said that reaction “didn’t sit so well” with him. And again I reiterated that I was just surprised when I found he’d taken pictures and I was processing it. It felt like he had an unfairly reactive response.

I reminded him that I am really brand new to this lifestyle and he’s literally the first person I’ve played with so it might take me a minute to wrap my head around some things. It felt like we were at an impasse so I said we’d have to agree to disagree. I don’t think I am in the wrong here but I somehow feel like I’m being made to feel bad for having a reaction and being honest about it.

It’s been weighing on my mind all day and I’m not sure how to handle it. In a way I think it’s not worth having a play partner cause these uncomfortable feelings, but we have been playing for a few months so maybe it’s more serious than just a casual play relationship so more feelings are bound to be involved.

On one hand I feel I should just stop seeing him but also the release I get from playing with him would be hard to give up. And I don’t know if this is really such a big deal to end things over. All I know is that it’s been on my mind all day and doesn’t feel good.

Sorry this got way longer than I expected, thanks for hanging in there!

TL,DR: my dom took pictures without my knowledge or consent and wasn’t receptive to my reaction. Do I keep playing with him?