I see people serving others on some media platforms, love the idea of Service, love the idea of having a structure, and yet when it comes to how do I want those for myself, my mind goes blank.

Stuff I'd want would be like 30% sexy and 70% functional as well. Like, determining what kind of clothes they'd wear, I don't know fashion too well so outfits are not my strong suit. Fine. I could still do that. But in terms of functional things, I'd want things like... and there we have it, really. My mind going blank. It's really either "I'm not comfortable with them doing that" (say, sorting my mail and throwing away some out, potentially throwing away important details. If they'd have to ask me then I might as well do it), or "only I can do that" (working out at the gym).

And when I think what I want, generally, my mind goes mostly blank. What I want feels kinda simple. Work out. Eat well. Sleep well. Work on my business. Make more money. Find work I enjoy.

I know another part of all this as well, is feeling awkward telling them what I want done. Even something little. Telling them "take this dish to the sink" vs asking "can you take this to the sink". It's like being a different person that's a little imposing, maybe rude, and idk how to feel about that.

I'm not sure if I have a question per se. Has anyone had something similar happen to them? Any questions to maybe help me process through this would be superb.