UPDATE I was wanting to learn more about this lifestyle> My wife got into this behind my back even though i wanted to be apart of it, I got her to do S&M for a while didn't really feel it and don't know where to go to from here. She said I miss understood colors and i did but she waited till 4 months after all that to tell me i was doing it wrong, and continued to hide it from and tell everyone i don't respect her boundaries because i was a new Master. Even though when After-Care was over and i asked if i did anything wrong she said nothing. But now she is using those experiences to turn her friends against me. SO i would just like some good guides for how to be a good dom and understanding my sub better.

Soooo.... we are getting a divorce... and she already has a new Dom... womp womp.