Hey there. My current submissive and I have been together for going on 9mo. I am more experienced in the dynamic and every attempt to communicate our boundaries has been met with "I don't like these conversations" and immediately leads to her giving in to "whatever I want". Which isn't true. For context she belongs to a private play group and I am almost like a satellite member who is still establishing myself in the group. The last party we went to there was no discussion ahead of time or preparation because I was made to believe it was a birthday party and not a play party. The group did their thing as normal, and I am a fairly open person. But she was very much into the others touching her and vice versa. When I asked if this was a normal thing she acted as if it was. I asked her if we could talk about it and establish boundaries and she acted as if I was trying to dictate what she was doing, which is the furthest from the truth. We have another party coming up this weekend and I attempted to establish boundaries with her. I don't want to do something she isn't comfortable with and when, I mentioned that if someone touches me and I am ok with it oelr vice versa, where she stands on it. She only claimed "well if it's happening to me I'll have to be ok with it happening to you." The whole time she said this I could see her facial expressions twist as if she wasn't comfortable with that idea. When I ask if she is being honest with me, she says "yeah it's only FAIR". I guess I'm confused. What if any advice do you all have. I'm deeply in love with this woman and respect her so much. Is she really ok with me participating? Or will this be a double standard type scenario? Any advice is appreciated. TLDR: My sub is having a hard time establishing boundaries and won't admit she is uncomfortable with things. Help.