Basically what the title asks but to go into detail, i am coming across men who are claiming to be very kink positive and well-versed with BDSM culture / lifestyle but something about them makes me weary that their knowledge is probably coming from p0rn or some kind of movies and not actual experiences.

I would be happy to receive some questions i could ask or behaviours i could look out for in my conversations with people that could help me weed out possible fake doms or people who know nothing about BDSM or eliminate people for whom BDSM = tying, choking, rough fucking, spanking (which i know is ABSOLUTELY NOT THE CASE and BDSM's scope is much greater and wider than that).

This would help me meet actually experienced people and help me have a good experience.

Thank you!