So for some background I’m in a long distance bdsm friends with benefits situation with one of my best friends, an interesting situation to be sure, but I believe we’re actually handling it quite well and that’s not the topic of this post.

She is my mistress and I’m her slave and we have been exploring our interests as best as we can given the distance. I recently was unable to perform one of the tasks she gave me because of things out of my control so I asked her to please give me a punishment in response. Her being the wonderful mistress she is actually gave me the not so fun punishment of researching and writing a two page paper on some mental health stuff that’s been affecting me lately and how to better cope with it, which was actually surprisingly helpful and she relished in the fact of giving me a punishment I wouldn’t actually enjoy, cause I LOVE being punished. She was kind enough to then reward me for a job well done on the paper and gave me a punishment that I would actually enjoy: to leave some bruises on my ass from spanking.

I know she loves seeing the bruises and I absolutely adore it as well. Seeing them is a wonderful reminder of my place as her slave and feeling the pain whenever I walk around or sit is wonderful. I’ve done three self spanking sessions since we’ve started this dynamic over the course of a couple of months. We are aware that the more you do it, the more your body gets used to it and it’s harder to bruise so we try not to do it too much so I don’t develop a tolerance, so to speak. The second time was the only time I actually managed to get some real bruising and it was some relatively rough looking bruising (enough so that she asked me to be careful in the future and make sure I did some research to ensure I don’t cause any permanent or lasting damage to myself). But I had actually already done a decent amount of research and I was pretty sure I did a good job. Sure enough the bruising was gone within a couple of days and I didn’t suffer any complications.

Today however I did similar to what I did that second time. Starting with my hand, then switching over to my riding crop. The riding crop I have is great for more of a stinging effect rather than a thumping type of hit, if that makes sense and I’ve read that thumping hits can be better for bruising as opposed to stinging being better for redness so I will also use the reverse side of the riding crop and hit myself with the handle as I saw somewhere (possible even on this subreddit) that using some wooden dowels were effective for creating bruising and this seemed to be similar. It worked really well last time but this time I only got some welts but no real bruising. Don’t get me wrong my ass is sore and I love the sensation however I wish I could bruise better. I sent her pictures and told her I was having trouble getting the bruising and she of course loved them regardless and praised me for a job well done cause it’s a really healthy relationship when it comes down to it and I know she doesn’t want me to over exert myself and truly hurt myself, but the bruising is as much for her as it is for myself and to be completely honest, I’m just a little disappointed.

She’s been good about making sure I don’t go into a sub frenzy and go overboard and I don’t want to actually disappoint her by going too far as much as I want to keep going. Does anyone have any advice on how I could more easily cause bruising on my ass? I’ve unfortunately never been one to bruise too easily so maybe it’s just not meant to be but I’d love nothing more to provide my mistress with the bruises I know she’d like to see and like I said, they’re as much for her as they are for me.

Apologies for making this so long winded I guess I just wanted to be specific and also properly convey that it is not my mistress who is pushing me beyond my safe boundaries or having me post on here. I have gotten nothing but green flags ever since I met this wonderful goddess. If you have any questions to clarify anything I’m willing to do my best to answer everything. Thanks, in advance, everyone!

Tl;dr: I want some advice on how to get some nice bruising on my ass through impact play performed on myself while still staying safe.