The classic case of YouTube shorts comment section about a Reddit question of "what's the worst fetish/kink" or something similar.

My own kink, cgl was of course one of the most hated one in the comments! Even my family members who know about my kink (they accidentally walked in) say that there's nothing they can do to defend that kink because they think it's wrong.

My life would be a lot easier and more normal if I wasn't into cgl (ddlg to be more specific), wouldn't it? If I could somehow get my brain to stop liking it. But no, just being in denial didn't make it go away and the fact that nonsexual ddlg scenes (playing with dolls, colouring) bring my stress level down and help me with much more doesn't make it easy. I have arranged myself a little cage in my room that's specifically for ddlg and I've used a lot of money to make it exactly how I like. Not too over or under stimulating.

I have mixed feelings about this whole "I'm into something everyone outside the community hates" situation. Of course I'd like to be normal or at least not have a crappy childhood so I could be 100% sure it's not trauma based. I know it might be best for me to "grow up" and start being interested in more socially acceptable kinks but I can't brush aside the good things I think ddlg would bring to me or to at least get into little space and not needing to pretend I'm tougher than I am all the time. I'm a very sensitive person but I tough it up all the time because I'd be reacting to everything "normal" in a very extreme way otherwise (like in a situation where I meet a new person and I have to suppress anxiousness and fear because then the panic would take over and ruin everything). In my little cage there's no need to suppress or tough it up.

But no, it seems to be wrong because I like childish things like pastel colours and I don't mind at all being sexualised for it. If something I do can make you want me more than anything in the world why on earth wouldn't I give it to you and risk losing you? It's not 100% non sexual for me all the time, the 10% to 30% of the time when it is sexual are preventing me from becoming an "agere", someone who uses age regression that looks like non sexual cgl for therapeutic purposes. Meaning it's safe from all the hate and the hate it gets can be blamed on the "disgusting cgl people who fetishize out coping mechanism". I don't even age regress, I'm just being the sensitive authentic self which happens to be what people consider childish behaviour.

I know I just came here because I want people to tell me that it's okay to have kinks and not to let the haters get under my skin, you know. To get reassured that I'm not committing a crime by sitting in a cage once a month and buying the things I like off the toy isle. But mostly what I need is an opinion of if my interest in cgl is actually harming to anyone and advice on how to deal with shame and guilt. Because if they win, I'm sure my religious relatives will be able to find some kind of conversion therapy for me to block these horrible desires of being my authentic childish self and still being taken care of and seeing me as the sexually attractive woman I (think?) am.