My 36f and husband 34m have been together for ten years. Married for 6. I found out about his years of cheating a few weeks after we were married. We separated several times from 2018-late 2020. We got together back and forth because I was struggling HARD with all of it. But I love him and wanted to make it work.

This man PUT IN THE WORK. He and I went to so much counselling. Together and separately. He worked for years to show me he isn’t that person and he wanted to change and be better. And he Is! He’s incredible. He’s amazing. He’s supportive. We are best friends.

However, I have never ever been able to get our “spark” back. Temporarily during hysterical bonding we did but it still wasn’t the same. Before the cheating we had passion. We kissed deeply and I felt his love. Physical touch is my love language and all these years later I am realizing I’m just closed off/my heart is blocked to these things with him

To complicate things we’ve also had two kids in two years but as time keeps going on I wonder how or if that spark will ever come back or if I’m just destined to have a great life with my best friend without those feelings forever.

To clarify- I DO think he’s attractive. I do kiss him. We are intimate. We do hold hands etc but the feeling isn’t the same