It’s been almost 4 months since DDay. The day it happened, I left. I found out she cheated 1-2 days after the first encounter. She continued the affair for about 30-45 days before telling him to fuck off because he was a douche. I’ve learned that infidelity is sometimes a symptom of underlying issues; which is true in my case. We were in a very toxic cycle before it happened, then one day it happened. I don’t blame her most of the time, but sometimes I still think “why” - even though I really do know why.

I let go of all anger and resentment. The only emotion left is sadness, I just get sad when I think about it. This is really a big step because I had anger issues in the past. I realize that if you truly want to overcome infidelity, you need to let that shit go.

We weren’t married, no kids, just an unimaginable love that broke down after 5-6 years. I still feel the bond, it may be shattered but it’s there. I still feel her soul even though we are miles apart, sometimes I think I can still feel her pain when she hurts. I have hope and faith that this can still work, that’s the main reason why I’m here.

Sure it can be fixed, and it will likely be better than before. However, there’s always going to be that scar, a constant reminder of who we once were. I’m fine with it, and I will persevere whether it’s with or with her. I just know that she is so damn special no matter what, and that to me is true unconditional love.

Should I stay or should I go? Looks like only time will tell at this point… but for now, I will continue to heal.