Well hello! We're Maynard & Reznor, two miniature poodles living in the Atlanta area with our human dad. We both realize that this is a bit of an unconventional post, but neither of us are getting any younger and we feel it's time to find us a loving, younger mom.

Here are SFW pics of us and Dad  - he's 6'2", 220 lbs, while we're both just a wee bit smaller at 25 lbs each (though we think we're 100 lbs on our walks).

https://imgur.com/a/28xqjmJ

A little about us - Maynard was a stray living on the streets that Dad adopted 10 years ago. He was found eating trash, not microchipped, and hair so dirty that he was almost brown. After a much-needed grooming appointment, Maynard quickly showed Dad all the tricks that he loved to do when he was presented with a tasty treat. Reznor was discarded to a kill animal shelter by a shitty family with shitty kids that tormented him, and the shelter told Dad that he was aggressive. (Reznor would like to say that in the 5 years we've all been together he's never even tried to bite anybody, and would much rather have a lot of belly rubs).

Ok, so about our dad. We're a bit biased, but we think that he's a pretty good catch. He founded a company that sells those big, nifty dental X-ray machines that have probably scanned you at one time or another. We love that he mostly works remotely from home so the three of us can spend our days together. When he does travel for work, he always puts us up in top-notch accommodations, though it's a bit annoying that he's always checking in on us on the live video feeds at our boarding facility.

We gotta say though, he's a great cook! He makes a lot of dishes from scratch. We particularly love his tostadas, trout, pot roast, and shrimp & grits, and wait for him to either accidentally drop food on the floor or for him to give us a bite (he usually does both).

Dad likes to go hiking, but unfortunately we're both a bit too old nowadays to come along with him, so we prefer staying home and trying to figure out how to knock over the trash can.

He loves to travel, and hopes that your passport is up to date! Dad would rather be on a white sandy beach with clear blue water than anywhere else.

The three of us really enjoy cuddling together and watching TV and movies. Dad's a big fan of most genres, but particularly likes sci fi, fantasy, thrillers, and comedy. We recently finished Stranger Things 4 (Eddie!!!) and are now watching Killing Eve. Don't even get us started on Schitt's Creek, our favorite show after Breaking Bad. #davidrosesweaters

Dad doesn't play video games or enjoy anime, making him an oddity of some sorts on Reddit. We don't care too much for watching sports either (we  hasn't even watched a Super Bowl in at least 5 years).

Dad has absolutely no musical talent whatsoever (and we've seen him dance, it isn't pretty), but he loves going to concerts. He's seen a lot of shows! He's pretty big into standup comedy as well.

He's had a vasectomy and is 100% childfree, so neither of us worry about competing with tiny humans for his attention and affection. We're adamant about wanting a mom who doesn't want human children and doesn't already have them.

Our dad is a political centrist, but like most rational people, doesn't like Donald Trump or what he represents (we'd run away from home if he did), and he fully supports women's bodily autonomy and LGBTQ rights. He goes back and forth between being an atheist and an agnostic, we think he should just call himself spiritual and be done with it.

He doesn't smoke or do any drugs, but he enjoys good bourbon. The three of us are all for marijuana being legal, but we don't want our mom smoking it in the house (not fans of the odor).

Our ideal mom has a big heart for humans and all creatures. Preferably not badly allergic to cats as Dad would like to adopt one or two in the future. She's quite a bit younger than dad, physically active and takes care of her body as well as her mind (mental health issues are ok if in active treatment for them). The three of us really love meat and cheese so we'd prefer that she not be a vegan, it just wouldn't work. As far as religion and politics go, Dad is open to dating anyone as long as they are not an extremist on either side.

We're not tied down in Atlanta and can relocate, we just want to be with a loving and caring childfree mom, wherever she happens to be. So if any of this resonates with you, send us a chat or DM. Please allow us ample time to respond, we don't have opposable thumbs. 🐾