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Most people are monotonous. Whether they’re desi or not. A lot of people also fall into negative stereotypes, adhere to backwards or regressive customs/traditions and, overall don’t have any type of hobbies or interests that really separate them from the rest.
What about you? What makes you unique or special? What qualities about your being makes you really stick out and separates you from the rest?
Now I’m not saying to try and distance yourself from the culture and actively attempt to denounce your existence but let’s be real, a lot of desi folks try very hard to appease their parents and fall into neat little boxes to where a lot of us end up seeming the same. Going into professions like engineering or biology, guys not knowing how to take care of themselves, being very cliquish and not talking to other races, and a million other things are factors that I see within my own family.
I’m 28, Pakistani, and born raised in NYC. I’ve been here my whole life and I’ve actively worked at trying to stand out and differentiate myself from others. I admittedly became a little more “whitewashed” for a lack of a better term when I was younger but I’ve also become more comfortable in my own skin and realized that there is no real way to be desi.
I ended up venturing into the education field, I don’t know another language besides English, I love to cook, I consider myself emotionally intelligent, and I don’t complain about not being able to find others. I experienced racism in my life but I overall got along well with other races and don’t find white or black folks off putting like a lot of other desi people I’ve interacted with do.
I’m a big baseball fan and I’m not crazy about curry or most desi food - though I do like the flavoring and tend to cook with the same spices and consider myself agnostic though I grew up Muslim. None of my interests truly separate me from other desis but I think being in education makes me stand out quite a bit.
I’m just curious and I’d like to see how others operate and how everybody here is different from one another - or at least how they think they’re different.
- Underachiever
- Can't stand Bollywood - movies and music sucks
- Have opinions and not afraid to say it. If someone's offended, their fuxking problem for asking
- don't have the "nice girl" syndrome and can't stand "nice girls"
- don't drink
- hate clubbing, it's so boring
- stripper at 40s and the only desi stripper in my area (at least I haven't met other desi adult entertainers in my area)
- into the bdsm lifestyle. I know other desi men into kink but not as many women
- I write erotic romances/smut fiction NOT literary fiction though I respect Arundhati Roy and Jhumpa Lahiri. I wanted to write the next Great Indian American fiction but failed miserably plus writing romances is more fun 😁
- atheist, I have yet to meet desi atheists 40 yrs and older. Agnostic sure but not atheists
- support lgbtq rights and community. HAPPY PRIDE WEEK
- bisexual
- swing dancing and I like rockabilly music. Great place to meet older men 40
- not specifically interested in any race. I could care less what race you are as long as there's compatibility.
- not putting white guys/girls on the pedestal. Seriously wtf? Stop seeing dating or friendship with white people as a status symbol. Race fetishization is embarrassing and makes you look like a fool.
- refusing to engage in pity partying about not finding anyone because you're desi. Hasn't been an issue for me. Sure I faced racism. Stop that race drama, wear deodorant, don't be a loser. It's honestly that simple. Also see above point of putting whites especially blondes on a pedestal.
- have a variety of interests
- extroverted, outgoing - usually non-indians are surprised by this because they think desis are soft spoken and shy
- hang out with everyone and enjoys diversity
- tip generously. Regardless of your opinion of tipping. The servers, beauticians, and tipped staff do not get paid enough and if they did a good job, they deserve it.
And yeah I'm sure I'll now get DMs by a bunch of horny dudes after mentioning a few points above. I have plenty of dick pictures to send them (obviously not mine). Or I'll ask them for a ridiculous amount of money. That sends them away.
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One Indian guy (not very attractive at all) was commenting on YouTube about how white women are a status symbol. Once he started dating a white woman, he noticed a change in his life. He's attracting more women and people come talk to him.
My jaw dropped and my eye rolled. Wtf?!
You should see desi guys especially those certain types with greasy bad hair, no deodorant, and fresher sex starved types who come into strip clubs. The way they act is embarrassing. And cheap as fuck but will not ask but demand extras and sex. And cannot take a no.
The way they fetishize white girls is so bad that it's embarrassing. One of my coworkers told me that she's glad that she's black because Indians ignore her.
They literally think they can take a girl home for $20. Lmao. Since I'm desi they feel entitled to free action from me as if I'm there to dispense sex.
I told one desi customer that I do not meet anyone outside the club. He asked why. I told him, "Would you suck my boyfriends cock for $20? Same reason."
One idiot had the audacity to actually ask me, "where can I find a white girl to fuck?"
I laughed and said "Never cuz you're a loser." And walked away.
The only place where I can be rude to idiots. I love it.
To be fair, fresher Mexican guys also have the reputation for being cheap. But fresher desi guys are not popular with bartenders or strippers for good reasons.