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Its probably the most painful thing I've done in my life.
Actually no, staying would be more painful because I refuse to go back to alcoholism to cope with my backwards/too traditional/no communication/Dv in family/SA in family/hide everything from everyone - family!
I want to know; has anyone else gone no contact with parents or family to keep their sanity?
I just can't take it anymore. Would love to hear from people who're happier today as a result; maybe that'll give me some hope.
I need a hug.
Edit: also curious to know! do you get backlash or support from extended family?
In my family everyone says "what can we do?" And that's that. No solution to any problem.
Edit#2: THANK YOU ALL THAT SHARED THEIR STORY/SITUATION. It has really helped during this tough time. MUCH APPRECIATED 🙏🤗🙏.
Hugs. I understand how hard it can be. I went no contact with my father 20 years ago. It's the best decision I made.
After that I ended up marrying an abuser and now divorced him. I also don't have to deal with his crazy family aka my in-laws.
You'll feel a difference. Please do not allow yourself to get addicted to any substance. Find a local DV group, support group, and therapist. Make healing and self-care a priority.
And you will deal with family and people who won't get it. You will lose friends. That'll sting.
Allow yourself to grieve. Allow yourself to sit with your feelings.
It stings to know that both my narcissistic abusive father and ex-husband did not care about me. Or my ex does not care about our kids either. Both men used me.
I highly recommend a therapist and reading up boundaries by Nedra Tawaab. She's online and has written books about boundaries.
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You'd be surprised. My therapist is a white Jewish woman and there are similarities. I had good experiences with black, Asian and white therapists.
I had a terrible, judgmental indian lady as a therapist. She didn't get it. She was the worst I ever had.
Groups online are helpful. Good luck.