This has been on my mind lately. I had two friends (elementary school friend who moved in 6th grade, and high school friend I fell out of touch with after graduation) get back into contact with me on MySpace (obviously, this was a very long time ago, before FB was open to everybody) a while before their weddings and then ghost me after the weddings.

In both cases, I was *so* excited when they reached out and while I didn't expect us to be besties again, I did think that we were going to like, chat at least semi-regularly and hang out if we were ever in the same area (one stayed near our hometown and the other moved but to a town I went to semi-regularly).

In both cases, they got in touch with me maybe 6ish months before wedding invites went out. Also in both cases, after they stopped talking to me, I went back and looked at our convos and realized how one-sided it was. I was the one doing most of the asking of questions & reaching out, even though both of them were the ones that found me originally.

In the case of one, it was a medium-sized wedding, I guess (around 75 people) and I gave a really nice gift off the registry and like $250. Never heard from her again after, and eventually when I sent a message that was very civil, but direct in asking what I'd done wrong/why she stopped talking to me because I had combed through our messages and couldn't find anything, she blocked me.

The second time, the wedding was huge. I got an invite and it only listed the church, so I assumed that the reception was there too. It wasn't. She'd just invited a bunch of people to the church but not the reception, which I found out from her mom at the church and AFTER I'd placed my gift on the gift table and my card in the little card wishing well (which I had thought was slightly odd that it was up in the foyer to the church but just figured that's where they were doing that part and the reception was in the basement).

When her mom told me that the ceremony was for everybody but only select people were invited to the reception, I remember standing there for a long time, honestly just in shock. Most people filed in to the church and after standing there like a robot, I was like "Fuck this" and then I grabbed my gift, fished my card (with a check for $250) out of the wishing well, and walked off.

Went home, again, looked at our exchanges, saw how one-sided it was, and felt bad. So I sent a really heartfelt message to my friend about how shitty it was and how it looked like it was just a naked gift grab. She sent me back a message about what an asshole I was to send her such a message on her wedding day, clearly I was a terrible friend. Someone saw me take my gifts back and how if I'd taken the time to actually go to her wedding, it just showed what a terrible classless person I was to take them back. I remember replying something like "I guess you'd be the expert in being a classless person" and she blocked me.

Some time after THAT, a 3rd friend contacted me. She and the woman from the first story used to be...triple best friends? A best friend trio? Anyways, I was more reserved with her, and sure enough, some months after she contacted me and we'd had fairly minor conversation (because I wasn't feeling trustful or enthused), she tells me to let her know my address because she wants to send me a wedding invitation. I told her that I didn't really feel like I knew her or reconnected with her enough to go to her wedding and she responded "Ok, well, here's my registries, if you're interested" with links and so I unfriended her.

I'm wondering if I just had a run of really bad luck with this, or if others have stories that were similar. What did you do, when you realized what was going on?