I lost my partner to heart failure a couple of months ago. He was just 29 and we dated for a year. I know it doesn't sound long but I already knew when I met him that he was the one for me. I'm not exactly the easiest person to understand and I thought, finally, this was the person to change all that.

Now that he's gone, I honestly don't know if I will ever be the same. I mean, I know things will never get back to normal. I think I'm doing better than I expected myself to be at this time: I managed to get back to work relatively quickly, got myself a new place; I even started dating. But every single person I meet becomes a reminder that there will never be someone like him who understood me without trying, seemingly. And I feel guilty because of this: I know it is horrible to compare a potential partner to another, especially if that someone has already passed, but I couldn't help it. I am trying my best to be fair to everyone, but I am slowly accepting as well the possibility that since I will forever love him, this will probably be my life moving forward.

Am I being unfair to his memory or to the people I'm meeting? Am I dating too soon? I don't think there are definite answers to these, but what is certain is that my life is forever changed with his loss, and I will never really go back to "normal," whatever that means. And I have to accept that one way or another.