So I don't have a lot of support. His family was estranged from him and never made peace before and I don't have a huge support system either due largely from coimg from a toxic family, heavily religious and the loss of my mom. Needless to say, we were each other's biggest supporter. So to combat my lack of support, I've been looking into grief groups and bereavement stuff, etc and since covid it's mainly online but I don't want weekly/daily reminds with tips and advice about grief etc emailed to me. I know he's gone and never coming back and I'm going to be all this other crap but how can I find support without being reminded why I need support? I don't have friends and the ones who came around the first few days are already starting to fall away and if one more fucking person tells me they will "try to see if they can make it" I'm going to fucking murder them cuz thank you for telling me his memorial service is a fucking inconvience to you!!!!!!!! I just need help and him and I have no where to go and no one to turn to.