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My anger for my loss is pouring out in really unhealthy ways. The littlest things bothering me, for every kind person there seems to be 1000 insensitive idiots. Even kind people can bother me, I'm gonna try and go hit my punching bag and get it out in a healthy way but idk what I want anymore. I wanted her and the life we had and without that I don't see hope. I hate when people tell me empty platitudes about time healing everything, it makes me feel like I want them to lose their partner so they can realize how stupid it is even though I don't really want anyone else to experience this pain. Today is an angry day for me and I'm yelling into the wind
I'm one of those people that always planned everything out and for the most part my determination has always been able to nudge my future into the way I want it. Now I feel powerless and that all control has been taken away from me and that I'm just drifting through life not knowing where I am going and it's unbearable
I had someone who got divorced after seven years tell me that they know how I feel and everything happens for a reason. Made me wanna bust their teeth out and ask them what reason there was for me doing it
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- 1 year ago
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That's exactly how I feel, like I'm about to begin my villain arc, the thoughts of what she would want from me are holding me at the edge but I'm so close to going over