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On Friday, September 6 at approximately 5:30pm, a man broke into my garage (three kids crashed a stolen car in my fence last week, creating this hole). He stuck a cucumber into the front grill of my car, lowered his pants, and proceeded to have anal sex with it. When a car passes by, he stops and then moves toward the hole to continue. When done, he places the remaining cucumber (two thirds of it having been left in my grill) back in his lunchbox and leaves.
The video shows the incident but no nudity is visible.
A police report has been filed. This was in Truxton Circle NW, across from Dunbar High School. If you have any tips, please contact MPD. Be careful out there - protect your car and your produce’s virtue.
How the hell did he get the cucumber in the grill?
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- 2 months ago
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