Turned 24 recently, still sexless and relationshipless and have just got back from a night out drinking and feel absolutely awful. Everyone there was strangers to me so I was just kinda of hovering about looking for anyone not in a group to talk to and thought about approaching some girls, but I just can't think of anything to say to anyone that's mildly interesting. I can't make friends and I can't get a girlfriend, plus I hate my job and can't get another one and have no idea what I'm doing in life. I hate myself, I hate my autism and I think I should kill myself but I'll never go through with it because A) I'm too much of a coward who's afraid of dying and B) I know no one will particularly miss me besides my parents.

Don't worry, I'm not gonna do anything, but I hate it. I need companionship and intimacy and have no idea how I can go about getting it.