For starters, I like to think of myself as a fairly reasonable person.
I respect people's opinions and points of view, even if they completely oppose my own, as long as they don't try to invade my rights.

One thing I hate more than anything else, is people who refuse to respect my choices and opinions, even when I respect theirs.

I am SO, SO FUCKING SICK of people being disrespectful, dismissive and rude to my personal choices,

but the one that gets the most negative attention, is when people find out I don't plan to have kids, ever.
They start interrogating and questioning me like they're getting paid for it.

Some of the most irritating, nerve-racking responses I've gotten to
''Oh, I don't actually plan on having kids.'' or similar statements have been:

''You'll change your mind.''
''What if your parents thought the same, huh?''
''What's your meaning in life?''
''I thought the same when I was your age too''
''Your biological clock is ticking!''
''all women end up wanting kids though. They are designed to have and want kids''
''but YOU were a kid once!''
''Who's going to take care of you when you're old? You'll be lonely in a nursing home?''
''Your family must be SO disappointed in you.''
''Why do women nowadays hate kids so much?''
''If everyone thought the same as you, we'd die out and the human race will go extinct!''
''no man wants to marry a woman who doesn't want kids. You'll be lonely for life.''
''Explain to me why you don't want kids, and you better have a valid reason.''
''but it's the most beautiful thing ever to make kids. It doesn't make sense to me why you wouldn't want to.''
''Then you're a waste of oxygen, that's your entire purpose as a woman. Why don't you just K\** yourself then?''*
''What's wrong with you, did you have childhood trauma, is that why you don't want kids?''
''Childless cat lady!'' (No, this didn't come from JD Vance btw, it was a family friend)

Some of these, particularly the first few, are things I hear over and over after telling people I don't plan on having kids.

These people seem to think becoming a parent/mother (mostly mother, as I've seen childfree women be pestered more than childfree men, but It can definitely go both ways.) is something everyone has to do,
and there's no if's, or's, or but's about it. Like it's written in stone.

I'm sick of it. Let me make things clear. No, I won't change my mind. I know that.
And no one has the place to tell me that because I'm pretty sure they can't see into the future, so they can't tell me what I will or will not do in the future. I know better about what I'll do than someone else does. Especially someone who barely knows me. And just because you ended up changing your mind doesn't mean everyone else will, just like you did, and end up having kids. It's very dismissive and disrespectful to just blurt out ''you'll change your mind'' after someone has told you about what they've decided on. You can't just go around telling people they''ll change their mind because you did, because not everyone is you. My purpose in life isn't simply to be a parent. I don't know for sure what my purpose is, but someone telling me that my only reason in life is to bring more life and if I don't want to I should just k*** myself is too excessive. It's also just a horrible thing to say to someone.

I want the same respect I give them. Just an ''oh, alright.'' would do.
Or an ''Alright, I respect your choice as long as you aren't rude towards my kids or anything.''

But do I get that as my usual response? No. I get insulted and ridiculed instead.

Easily, I could say that people who have kids are adding to overpopulation and that people who have kids only care about their own bloodline and family, because if they actually were as selfless as they made themselves out to be, they'd adopt a child in need of a loving home instead of bringing yet another child into an overpopulated and so flawed world because they want ''their own'' kid and to pass on their bloodline and legacy.
But when people tell me they want kids, or even call me selfish or tell me about how I have to have kids,
I don't say those things to them. Why? Because I respect their choice.
If they want kids, I'm happy for them and I hope they get the happy family they've always dreamt of.

If someone wants to call me selfish for choosing myself over someone who doesn't exist, then alright, fine.
I'm selfish. I choose myself.
These people clearly don't understand the meaning of selfish.
I could very easily throw that word right back at them because of the deadly economic impacts they're causing because they wanted to have a kid instead of adoption or literally any other option. Every birth is a death.
But I don't say that to anyone in person, because I know how to not attack people for their personal life choices.
Just because I don't want to have kids myself, doesn't mean I hate them.
Not wanting something ≠ hating said thing.
I would NEVER, EVER do something like make fun of a kid getting hurt. In fact, If i see a kid get hurt I'll help them in any way I can or call their parents.
Anyone who laughs at kids getting hurt is a complete asshole. DO NOT associate people who choose to not have their own children with those who are cruel to them. Not the same at all.

I hate the people who say not having kids is selfish. It’s not. It’s literally not. If ONE MORE IDIOT accuses me of being selfish and narcissistic because of my choice to be childfree, I’ll ask them why they, as such a selfless person, chose to bring ANOTHER person into an overpopulated and dying world of misery instead of adopting someone in need. Then I’ll watch their answer be something like ’’I wanted my own kid to take care of my when I’m old and to pass on my family name and legacy. Why should I adopt someone who isn’t related to me?’ Ask me why I chose not to have kids and my answer will be because ”I just don’t want them”. But people don’t accept this as an answer and they demand that I give a “valid” answer. You know what? Fine. I can give you so many other reasons I see as “valid” In this messed up world with hate, a gross (gross in the ew way, not in the lots way) economy, I think it's best for ME to not procreate. Would I consider adoption? Maybe. But I don't want to bring another person into this world. I just don't. And no, I’m by zero means saying having kids is a selfish choice, I’m saying people have kids because they want kids. Not because they want someone to be selfless to. People who call childfree people selfish just don’t like the idea of someone making a different choice than them and actually enjoying their life how they want to. Not everyone has to have kids! I’m so fed up with SOME parents being so rude to me over my choice. I wish they’d just respect my decision but NO! they always interrogate and insult me for it.. I’m SO FUCKING FED UP. I just want my choice to be respected. Gosh.. why is it such a hard thing to ask for?

Instead of bringing a kid into the world, with all that disposable money, I'm going to...
- pay my expenses. make sure I'm not in debt in this messed up economy.
- Provide for my cats. Maybe adopt more. (alright fine, perhaps the childless cat lady guy wasn't wrong, but what's wrong with that?)
- Spend the money on higher quality items that I'd usually spend on standardized items, such as organic foods.
- buy from small businesses instead of fast fashion or wholesale companies, as I like to support individuals instead of people.
- donate to charities I support such as anything related to genuinely helping animals or people in need.
- Help family to an extent, if they're in need.
- travel, if the opportunity is there.

I don't understand why people get so upset when they find out I don't want kids.
It's not like I said ''You shouldn't have (had) kids.''

It's my life. My choice. I don’t exist to please you. I don’t exist to do what YOU WANT me to do with my life.

I'm sick of not getting the respect I honestly think I deserve.
I try my best to be reasonable with people, but it's now really getting on my nerves. I just wanted to vent it out. I needed to let it out. I'm just so done with being disrespected and insulted over my choice.
The older I get, the more I get asked about this. It's not one of those things people stop asking you after you hit a certain age. It's one of those things people ask more and more while you're going into adulthood.

To anyone who took the time to read this entire thing, thanks so much for putting in the couple minutes to listen to my rant. I know you're a stranger, but it still means a lot to me that someone will hear me out.

If anyone could just give honest feedback to how I feel about this I would appreciate it.
Even if you disagree for any reason, you can comment, but gosh please don't be rude to me. I'm just so done with people forcing this on me.