I am so tired, I am tired of my boyfriend telling me how shitty his life is all the damn time I’m tired of him complaining about work, it doesn’t matter where he works at he’s never happy. It doesn’t matter what he’s doing he can even not be working and still be unhappy. He’s always finding something wrong with his life and if he can’t find something to complain about in his personal life then he’s complaining and cussing about the state of the world. Nothing I do is ever good enough it seems. When he’s pissed and complaining about work I’ve tried giving him solutions and he’s pissed when I do that so then I just sit and listen and try and be understanding but then I’m still not doing anything right so I’ll just not even say anything and that’s a problem too. I tell him he doesn’t have a shitty life but he gets pissed about that.

I’m tired of never being good enough for anyone in my life. I’m always doing something to piss someone off and I don’t understand what I’ve done. I bend over backwards for people I make myself available for them I do whatever they want me to do. I try and be understanding and I am the most empathetic person I know. I can read people like the back of my hand I pick up on subtle things about people. Today I was out with my parent and I joked about them buying more stuff they don’t need and they took it like I had an attitude and cut our day short and then lectured me on the ride home about how I had an attitude in the store when I didn’t I was literally smiling and laughing when I said it. But still I’m the one in the wrong.

I come home and tell my boyfriend about the situation and his solution is to just not let people treat me that way and when I tell him that he’s just like my parent that when he’s pissed he’ll come at me and tell me how I have a attitude or I’m the issue and he’ll yell and do the same shit my parent did he got pissed at me and started talking about how shitty his life is again and how shitty work is and how he doesn’t want to go to work etc

I’m just tired. I’m tired of it all. The only person I feel like I don’t disappoint or don’t piss off is my little one I at least feel like he genuinely loves me and doesn’t feel like I don’t everything wrong. 😔