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36 [M4F] If you're seriously looking for fun too: Everything, all cards up, seeking kinky matchup
Author Summary
1cantsaythisonbumbl3 is a male age 36 looking for a female in Vancouver, BC
Post Body

I don't believe someone here's into everything I am, but I'm listing it all with context to find a fun ongoing play partner.. kink and sex is important yet big swiping apps are behind.. I'm not dating or looking to, I want a regular longterm FWB.

Not making my kinks the entirety of my identity like some, I feel like kinky sex & D/s is a natural inclination.. in modern time we use labels, define everything, some go too over the top, others from various reasons fully dive in.. If you agree, that's a good perspective as a start and a healthy outlook..

seeking someone I like and enjoy as a person and sexually, moreover sexually for sure but still need to click as people, and recently turned 36.. personality/energy makes it tbh, it matters alot more now, it's not just matching sex/kinkwise

I'm not seeking a pseudo-relationship but need connection, especially because I have a higher sex drive so want to be spending few hours per each rendezvous playing together and longer term with lots of overlap in what we like is ideal

I am private about kinks/sexlife, etc, busy in life and overall chill, levelheaded, mature, experienced, balanced individual that's not interested in games/fakeness/deception and am interested in a straightforward real woman who's a good fit that is not worried about emotion or feelings in something like this because she understands it adds to make it better

  • Me/You:

Me: Brown man with shaved head, no beard, tattooed look. Attractive and well put together, definitely noticed in public. I'm kept busy Monday to Friday business hours with some early mornings and late days; *available nights, weekends. You: Introduce yourself a bit first, let's swap SFW pics then meet socially in public to see if we have mutual interest & chemistry to pursue more further.. I'm not interested at all in sexting/online/chat forever messaging etc; for IRL only.

  • Seeking:

For starters and my search I'd say a fun consistent regular play partner/fwb type of situation; I'm single, have enough on my plate, I'm not chasing after anything serious per se or a relationship, I just want one ongoing kinky match, but I'm also fully open for the right person when it happens, I have no aversion to something committed, I'd welcome it.. but of course that would mean two connect fully and want all the same stuff from life while most of their kinks align.. at this age now, I know what I like/want in life and* don't.. though, tbh I'm just not even interested in dating right now.. for now, seeking a good mix of kink, friendship & affection; Looking for 'the one right now', someone for 'fun long term' because time/comfort make for even better sex with kinks, not to mention I'm too greedy for one offs, and it's truly not fun/better always searching for someone new to hookup.. not a fan of Reddit but can't write all this into swiping apps

  • Limits*:

I'm going to start off with 'not into' before the 'what I'm into'

Hard limits: all the unhygienic ones -blood, scat, urine, etc., included eating ass which is off putting giving or receiving; super regressive age, especially very 'little' Dd/lg, cg/l; abdl; extreme cnc, as in way too real.. None of these are for me.. for me at best, 'middle' is ok and 'cnc' if derived from bratty; I've never found regressed ageplay & non-consent play hot;

Turn-offs: calling rough sex 'cnc' because it's not; using the term 'breeding' and for thinking bare sex cumming inside a woman on birth control is a 'kink' because that is just sex.. and let's be honest is preferred when playing safe together, as I'd rather cum in than cum on since* I cum multi-times; thinking D/s is all about physical restraints given it's also a energy & mentality; feigning kinks because faking isn't fun;

Soft limits: not the biggest fan of being called Daddy in bed tbh, it's ok sometimes yet the word isn't the kink, energy for connection is what matters; over the top dirty talk since it's a bit theatrical, not as real; some cnc and cg/l or dd/lg etc, only 'middle', semi 'cnc' have different energies for play so non-issue, they both are ancillary to my kinks, not sought; some bratty stuff can get annoying, less is more maybe idk as with sadist play, full masochistics all in is not my thing.. the things in soft limits are nuances in play for me, all open

  • Wanting:

I'm a kinkster, I like a lot in play, my desires aren't singular; Listing roles and kinks can get diminutive but as overview, I'm naturally kinkier D-type so I sync best with naturally sub service types in bed, being with the right match inspires to fully indulge especially when there's a connection overall;  ideally with an equally insatiable partner for hours of fun over full evenings of banter, drinks, 420, music, varied play. Overall in bed I want passion with kinks & dynamics in sex. One long play session a week is a great find, meeting a few times a week for few hours per would be the absolute best

I want a connection I'll enjoy not just one specific scene, I genuinely enjoy a lot with the right match, the right energy, generally I prefer a range from the dominant rough sex and play with oral, fingering, spanking, choking, orgasm control, edging, varying controlled positions, restraints, to toys, etc; Sometimes into; using gags, dirty talk, bit of degradation to hard choking, breath play to free-ish use, anal, impact play, sadism, service sub/slave, rope, praise, training, collaring, and that list goes on; can't script out a unique connection. Plus some slower and sensual play too, but moreso within  the umbrella of other dynamics, soft/sensual alone feels a bit unfulfilling, I feel there needs to be more variance to it.. in the same way that dialing only into sado-mas isn't fun.. And, somewhat under the kink umbrella; I prefer women in summer dresses, lingerie, heels, mostly a feminine classier styles to some outfits; and giving a softer side of aftercare massage, full-body oil play, cuddling, snuggling, caressing..

Caveat: some kinks are more present with one woman and not another because it boils down to mutual play overlaps for example; anal doesn't excite me unless she's into/open to it because I love pussy! not to mention cleanliness to do it, cleanup to go atv/atm; I've had a squirter fwb in past, it didn't excite me because I hated continuously playing on saturated beddings, but it was fine as that's how she came each time, just not my kink! I love spanking, choking, rough play, but if my partner isn't into it as much, I intuitively reign that in because it's not fun if they're not into it! Masks with spreader bar only comes into play if that's our mutual kink taste together, similarly I don't spit in every woman's mouth or call them 'good girl' or 'fucktoy' in play, it depends on 'us' and let's not even start on the conversations needed prior to the freeuse or sleepsex pre-consent, bratty vs limits, etc. I'd say it's all a spectrum, honest open dialogue is needed.. as kinky as I can be, I know not every woman will be into it;

I don't like to list my kinks in detail, but it always comes up first online, and mine are from past experiences over time.. my kinks here aren't exhaustive, and there's more I desire.. from extended heavy groping makeouts, repeated and yes reciprocated oral to adult nursing, oil play massages, many different outfits and lingeries on my partner, bimbofication at times, moments of tpe and of slave/toy/doll dynamics, as certain kinks are more prominent with different people.. I'm not trying to check off specifics, it's about finding a well rounded kinky enough dynamic with someone I like/enjoy.. someone not into vanilla only sex that's tepid in bed or any woman who read through this and was put off by my kinks because I have a higher sex drive and busy mind, I just love to suspend myself in good play, cum repeatedly, feel great

  • Desiring:

Currently I've been desiring breastplay, dry nursing, anr, abf if lactating, erotic tactile cuddling, reciprocal oil massages, with extended foreplay, oral, gropey passionate makeouts.. other kinks factoring in but mostly primally driven lust play. I've been missing anr/abf in kinky sex I enjoyed in the past understanding it's never all or nothing, putting it all out here to see who read commonalities and is interested in similar; I seek good company, vibe, chemistry with great kinky sex..

I realize not everyone matches energy completely for it all, Ideally wanting all the above but happy with just some of it; just anr/breastplay would be great, add to it rough sex and that's better, best is adding ongoing D/s aspects in bed for varied intensity play with toys, restraints, few dynamics for regular fun. I'm here hoping for a quality match with decent overlaps on this, along with some of my many kinks listed in effort to reach someone for who most of this resonates, not a fan of Reddit but can't write all this into swiping apps

  • Final Thoughts:

As I get older, my tastes and what I need evolve and shifts, as long as we have mutual attraction & chemistry, I'm open overall, although I strongly want an experienced woman.. I don't understand why Reddit is full of stupid posts by guys seeking 'inexperienced younger women' considering when you're in the throws of it better having a match into it all so you can play fully not stop and slowdown.. older & younger both work for me if we hit it off, infact I like differences and contrasts ie. age, backgrounds, styles, life experiences etc. Besides age isn't an identifier of experience and capability. But* the commonality I need is overlap kinkwise and in bed being in sync for connection that gets both of us off in play which is two sided, not one sided.. so experienced is more fun beyond that it's all about clicking well, liking eachother, and regardless of age or years of experience it's if we vibe, all of that's in-person real-world, it's either there or just isn't but having a match into same who's done/likes it, is a start not to mention understanding switching things up is better than to always be in one energy and playact or be a routine

I'm not all in on one paradigm of what a certain kink role is suppose to look like and be, it's more balanced if anything; It's the little things and nuances that add up leading to big variances like getting slobbery and dirty yet the hygiene is always clean, when there's degradation play there is often praise being that's the flip side of that, both energy swings from the pressed down taken but also held caressed more gently, checking in caring for how the extremer play leaves you, enjoying the sado-mas extremities in D/s but mindful to not markup or bruise because that's not my endgame in play and is something I don't enjoy seeing or doing, having an active play partner not just willing one because it's truly about mutual enjoyment, getting off and getting the other off because it isn't good sex otherwise & communicating what isn't really working since it's about finding our unique connection, defining what's off the table so it never sours our fun since there's things I don't like and things you don't. In the end, it's a fun kinkier dynamic filled sexual friendship

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They Are
a male
Age
36
Looking For
a female
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Posted
4 hours ago