I’m an early 40’s Southeast Asian married professional who is in a dead bedroom situation for many years now.

I am not classically beautiful by every standards of beauty so I know I am taking a stab in the dark here. I am average, on the curvy side and rather short. I however, have the grace of life experiences, a good education, wisdom and confidence that comes with age. I am trying to navigate the intricacies of marriage, a busy career, graduate school, cultural baggage and societal expectations.

We all have a type so please be fair and indulge me. I like tall white men, fit, strong, with a clean professional look, especially those with blue or green eyes. The Nordic or classical Scandinavian look simply makes my knees weak. I want to meet a man above 30. I don’t have a kink other than I really do have a thing for white men.

I am tired of always having the stiff upper lip, of being that strong independent woman who puts the needs of others above my own. For once, I simply want to be a woman. Soft and vulnerable. I need a man who will allow me to be weak in his arms, take care of me, take charge and let me lean on his strong shoulders. I am yearning for a romance beyond the confines of my vows. I want the forbidden, the allure of secrets. The thrill of anticipation and that dance between temptation, longing, desire and restraint, along with the myriad of emotional complexities that comes from forbidden love. I am a hopeless romantic at heart with a pragmatic laser sharp mind and a firm grip on my reality. I am not trying to escape my reality. I don’t plan to be Mrs. Number Whatever. I simply want to enrich my mundane with moments of serendipity and passion.

Know that I am not looking for a quick and empty physical connection. No, I haven’t exactly lived in celibacy all these years. I had my indiscretions. I’m only human after all.

What I want is an intangible spark, a frisson both from an intellectual and physical connection that only goes deeper the longer we get to know each other and spend quality time together. I only want one person, for something long term and on-going.

Please consider the practicalities, logistics and financial implications of carrying on an in person affair very carefully before you respond. I am based in Vancouver Island and travel to Vancouver infrequently. It would be ideal if you travel regularly between Vancouver Island and Vancouver. We can take turns seeing each other, commuting in between.

Thanks for reading this. I wish you all the best on your search for your magical unicorn. This is what it feels like.