i tend to feel bad for women who are ugly because society deems women as "the pretty gender" meanwhile society deems men the "personality/action" gender.

I also hate how some people get criticized for it.

I'm on the luckier side because I don't get criticized or feel ugly unless I were to do something where looks would matter like dating which i haven't done except once with someone online turned irl.

As much as being attractive might be alluring to some, the overwhelmingly liberating feeling of not being chased, not having to worry about being trapped to a family life, not having to lose half my self to a significant other is so amazing.

It beats that small feeling instead of "damn i wish someone thought i was attractive or desired me."

nobody gives a shit about how i look and i love it

even the one time i dated a "ugly redditor" irl (her words not mine) she liked me for my personality instead and it was liberating to know im never going to have to worry about how i look...

until i see myself and thats where my biggest problem is.

I always hate that i don't like the way i look and that always gets me down when family work etc takes a photo of me. I've never been proud to look in a mirror, avoid taking pictures as much ss possible.

I wish it wasn't this way, i wish i had both liberation and the ability to like the way i look.