So, you've read my post, and decided I was worth it to send a message to...

Hiiiiii! I appreciate the heck outta that, and would love to get to know you!

But, I'd like to be sure that you actually read my post. If you're unsure, and think you might've missed something, now's your chance to check! I'll even list the things that most people seem to gloss over while reading, so as to not waste your time:

• I'm monogamous
• I'm childfree, yes, including yours, yes, even if they're my age (super side eye at that, my guy)
• I smoke weed
• I'm nonreligious
• I put myself out there despite the fear of being doxxed - you can include a picture, too. Image hosting sites have been around for just as long as reddit - your refusal shows that you are either inept or not serious about me.

Alright, now that I've covered the "big shit," hey! I'm looking forward to seeing your message with my favorite animal as the subject. Whoops, miss that? Go back & read my post, it's filled with stupid ass one-liners you might like, too. If you don't like those... Well, my humor isn't for you.

If you didn't miss anything and have found great enjoyment with my annoyance here... Hi, I think it's kind of funny too how little people read what I poured my heart into! To the point where I've been giggling here & there like a madwoman trying to write this.