I find myself chaperoning a child's sleepover tonight. This is, technically, by choice. My son asked. I allowed him to invite these .... junior-highers 😬. I'm to blame, ultimately, but here I am. So, without further ado, a few random questions that absolutely nobody asked me. I am, however, choosing to answer them for you without regard for that fact.

1 Which finger is your favorite?

Does the thumb count? I'm gonna assume we're leaving the thumb out. In that case, I gotta go with the pointer finger on my right hand. It''s just so versatile. Additionally, you use it in conjunction with the thumb to do many, many cool things, writing as an example.

2 If you could choose exactly one water to drink for free forever, which would it be?

Ummm... free? What's the most expensive? Lets go with that.... in alkaline, like 8 or something. 8 is good, right?

3 Who's the best batman?

Oh that's tough. Strictly Batman? Definitely Christian Bale. He's got the build, the demeanor, the always-sad-because-my -parents-died-look in his eyes. Easy. Overall though, its not so easy. Maybe it's because I'm old or maybe it's because he landed Kim Basinger AND Michelle Pfeiffer back in the day, but I gotta go with Michael Keaton, who, coincidentally, is easily the best Bruce Wayne.

4 Favorite pizza?

Brand? Dominoes has really stepped up their game. Combination of toppings? Ham, mushroom, and onion. No question.

5 Who's the best Joker?

I haven't seen all of the Joker movie (when i finish, i'll update), but I think Heath Ledger has to win that one. So believable and genuinely terrifying in a what-the-hell-will-he-do-next kinda way which is, ultimately, what I believe makes the Joker such a good villain.

6 How much self maintenance do you think Optimus Prime does? Or where did he find a trusted garage to work on what he can’t fix himself?

I think they are all just naturally (can you say naturally when talking about a robot?) jacked in their robot form. I can't recall seeing any flabby transformers. On the contrary, the really old one that was an SR71 (cant remember his name) was certainly "showing his age". So, i suppose it's possible to "let themselves go" also. The vehicle form is just a facade, I think. Thus, my final answer is, they just heal "naturally" like we do, but ... in robot. 🙈 Open to correction. Now, the garage... IF they need maintenance, tjey almost definitely go to Alien Auto on Mathews St in Roswell, NM.

7 (follow-up) Does Optimus Prime engage in "self care"? what would he sound like? Would he shoot out oil?

oh geez. A whole new genre of porn... actually, I'm sure it already exists (rule34) 🙈 it stands to reason, however, that IF optimus engaged in that sort of activity, it would be hot and scalding. Better run 😝

8 What about Val Kilmer's lips in that Batman mask? He’s got to get some sort of aesthetic points, right?

I had to go back and look because the Kilmer and Clooney versions are my least favorite movies. No disrespect to Val Kilmer. He's played some roles I really like (freakin Doc Holliday 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻). His Batman script just went awry. Anyway, the lips. I googled an image, and I now think I must concede the Wore The Mask Best award to Val. He looks VERY angry and his lips, weirdly, play a role in that look.

9 What music do you listen to while you workout?

Is podcast a music? 😝 I know, I know. Lame 🙈 but the answer is Astonishing Legends, Mysterious Universe, Wild Thing, something related to true crime or missing persons, or any other weirdness that grabs my attention.

10 If given the choice, pizza or spicy, chewy, excellent noodles with good protein, veggies and sauce, which would you choose?

My first blush answer was pizza, but then you specified the noodles come with protein and veggies which maybe, possibly offsets the carb overload. So, I'm switching my position... particularly if they are served with chopsticks and by someone who knows her way around said chopsticks and is willing to give me some hands-on instruction.

If there are any other questions I failed to cover here, feel free to post them below or DM me. I'll be sure to update, but it's Friday night and this will most assuredly get lost in the shuffle. So, I will not be holding my breath waiting. All that said, in case I dont see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night.