so ayon

first day of my 3rd year in college na bukas

super rollercoaster yung decision ko kung mag enroll ba ako or hindi

hindi ko alam kung nahirapan ba talaga ako or nadadala lang ako kasi nahihirapan na din friends ko?

pero in the end nag enroll pa din aq lol, tnx to my seniors

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i really wanna prove myself this time, i know its hard learning in this set up pero i at least wanna make sure na its not just my fault bakit ako nahihirapan

i really want to do my best kaya im looking at things more positively kahit na ang fake niya pakinggan most of the time AHHAHAHAHHA at least on the surface positive pa den sha AHHAHAHHAHAHA

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kanina i was trying to pump positivity sa friends ko kaso walang pumatol AHHAHAHAHHAHA

i know that theyre having a hard time pero gusto ko den naman sana ng support sa agenda ko na maging positive this time AHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAH i dont want to go back to my dark 2nd year college days potangina

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kanina naalala ko na naman na di ko pinush ang dlsu

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alam kong gasgas na ito pakinggan sa friends ko pero what if talaga sa dlsu ako nag aaral?

i mean i understand na dapat education ang habol ko sa dlsu pero the student environment really is a big factor on how i develop

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tbh i love my uni now pero super fucking kj ng student body like wala man lang ka school pride school pride ang mga tao and wala man lang effort to at least participate sa activities for the students

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pero di ko din naman sila masisi kasi napaka panget ng ginawa talaga nila for the students and di siya engaging kaya ang hirap mag inspire ng new generation of student leaders

naintroduce sila na walang kwenta yung system and yung school spirit

i really want to be a part of an active community hay, CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT WHEN????

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ALSO PALA

as of writing this post, nakapag come out na ako sa closest friends ko as bi hihi <333

its freeing pero tbh it feels the same AHHAHAHAHHA

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siguro ang nagbago lang talaga is i can freely talk about the gay shit na nakikita or naeexp ko AHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

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TAS I LOWKEY REGRET SPILLING IT ALL DUN SA 2 RAINBOW FRIENDS KO HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHH

maybe i should have kept some things from them HAHAHAHHAHAHA

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DI NILA KINAYA YUNG KAKALATAN KO AND MY ONLINE SEX PERSONA AHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

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- Sep 5, 2021 -