Well, if anyone shows up here to read this, from the title/my post you can tell that I lost..

I can't remember when exactly it happened (probably like 3 AM-ish today 8/23), but I was seriously starting to get discouraged from sheer lack of sleep, comedown, and some DM messages going South. I was thinking things to myself like: "Was this just a stupid Idea?" (spoiler: yes it was, do not attempt lol), "Why am I doing this?", and so on. Things were really shitty feeling too, and I just knew something this stupid wasn't worth harming my body any more than I already had.

Believe it or not though, I was actually pissed the fuck off for losing when I first woke back up lol. I'm still getting over it kinda, which is so fucked cause I know there's so much more out there to life, and tbh nothing would change outside the internet anyways as a result of wining or losing. Like just because I didn't stay up long enough for a self-made challenge shouldn't affect me, but it is. Which, I'm just gonna chalk that up to good ole serotonin and call it a day.

I was also starting to hallucinate from sleep deprivation kinda wickedly, which wasn't really a bad thing. It was honestly kinda cool in a sense, because I've done LSD plenty of times and it had almost the same body-feel, but actual visuals. Like this one photo I had up I could've sworn the eyes kept moving and shit lmfaoo.

Regardless, I'd like to frame this whole thing as being a scientific-style experiment to see what 4 days no sleep was like, but it really was just a jerk-off bender at it's core. Gluttony has a big part to play in it too. Also a desire/fetish to show off my kinks to others. It's a lot of stuff combined really. I still have more of it to process but right now I really just don't feel like doing shit, not even edging.

Either way as punishment, I candle waxed myself earlier in the day after edging for a little and then decided not to cum too, like a loser lmfao. Honestly probably not ever gonna do this again, I'm getting too old to be putting my body through this kind of shit (the whole attempting 4 days no sleep, not candle waxing) lmfao.

Stay safe everyone!