I think the biggest, and most overlooked thing about me is my absolute need for deep, meaningful conversation. All of the other things aside, if somebody does not regularly engage me with interesting, or fun conversation topics, I'm just going to get bored.

Surface level conversation is a nightmare. The kind of small talk you'd have with distant family during Easter dinner. I avoid conversations like that every single day.

I love to be asked questions. If you don't want to get to know me, if you're not interested in learning more, I'm going to want absolutely nothing to do with you. Like most people, actually. I always say that I'd rather sit there quietly by myself than be trapped in a conversation I don't want to have.

"Well, what do you like to talk about?"

Anything that is actually thought provoking or interesting.

I once walked up to a friend in VR and it was clear he didn't know what to say. So we stood there staring at each other for a moment and he goes to me 'supposed to rain today'. I said back to him 'is that what we're going to do? We're going to talk about the weather?'

I want a real, meaningful connection that just happens to have ABDL tied into it. Yes, I enjoy wearing diapers. But it's not my whole personality.

I don't make my entire personality about my kink. I don't like people with 1 dimensional personalities, ever. It doesn't matter what it is. It could be cars, guns, Pokemon cards, hiking, talking shit. I don't care. If you have one interest and you've made it your entire personality, why the fuck would I want to talk to you?

"What do you see as your ideal mix of kink and real life?"

Preferably it would be more of a 50/30/20 situation. 50% of the time being normal, being spoken to normally and as regular of a situation as possible. 30% D/s behaviour and 20% littlespace.

So that means that most of the days, weeks, months would be spent being two normal people. Some kink peppered in there, to make things interesting.

Real life comes first. It always has for me.

If anything, I prefer being forced to be little. It's something that I find humiliating, and I love to be humiliated. I prefer it when someone degrades me.

For whatever reason, I need to make clear that this does not mean I want hurtful things said to me. I don't know why people seem to think that degrading someone means actually belittling them as a human being.

"Well how am I supposed to degrade you without belittling you?"

It's insane to me that I have to explain this. I may want to be called a dumb whore or a stupid baby, but that doesn't mean I want you attacking my character.

I once had someone who would degrade me by legitimately making me feel bad about things I'd done or said. The fuck?

Teasing is different than telling me I was a mistake in my parent's eyes.

"So do you not enjoy being treated as a baby? Do you not go into littlespace?"

I do definitely achieve littlespace, but it's different how I do it.

Having a normal conversation and having it peppered with little remarks is my dream. Being told to be quiet when I'm with someone, having a pacifier pushed into my mouth and cuddled is ideal.

"Speak when spoken to" is an ideal I live by. I don't expect to do the hard lifting of the conversation near the beginning of anything. You do the heavy lifting, because for the right person I am incredibly interesting. I have a lot to say, and I have very valid input. You just have to be the right kind of person to unlock that.

"What do you do with your time?"

An average day for me is pretty simple. I work from home, so I get up pretty much any time I want.

I wake up in the morning, hop on my PC in my room, then I typically make some tea. I relax for a bit, before getting into VR to hang out with my friends. I do that for a few hours, then I'll get off and get some work done if I have any to do. Rinse and repeat for the rest of the day until I go to bed.

"VR? What do you do in VR? I thought that was just a Zuckerberg thing."

I play a game called VRChat. This takes up most of my days.

I found VRChat quite a few years ago but had decided not to play it because I couldn't afford a headset.

I had been playing Secondlife but was super bored of it and very lonely. I moved to Overwatch chill/kills and realized I really enjoyed talking to people on there. Eventually I figured VRChat with no headset would be better than nothing, so I started playing in Desktop.

I fell in love with it my first day. I spent eight hours playing, and from there started uploading avatars on my second day.

I had already been taking classes for the past few years to learn how to use Photoshop, Illustrator and Premiere Pro. I was trying to find ways to earn money online.

I quickly realized that there was a big market for VRChat avatars and assets, but I figured I'd never be good enough to do it myself. I'd never touched Blender and I didn't even know how to texture models or what program was used.

So I started to learn how to use Blender, here and there I would make edits to my avatars and I kept getting better at it.

I started making a lot of friends in VRC, which was huge for me, because I didn't have a lot of friends at the time. A few friend groups had fallen through and I was pretty much alone at the time. So VRC was a way for me to make friends again. This was all during Covid as well, so going out was even less of an option than before.

After about a year and a half of making avatars for myself, a few friends started suggesting I took commissions. I had learned how to use Blender, Substance Painter and Unity on my own. So I made a few public avatars and from that my friend had said he wanted a little avatar for himself. I decided to surprise him with one for free, but he insisted on paying me. That was my first commission and I made $100! I was so excited.

From there, the public avatars I had made lead me to a few commissions. I had a returning customer as well.

Eventually I was dating someone who really encouraged me to continue, so I decided to make a Gumroad avatar. I took an avatar base someone else had made and modified it heavily. The base had commercial rights to it, so I was able to take what I had created and sell it on Gumroad.

The next day I got a sale. Quickest turn around I've ever had in regards to making money online. I made $50. Again, I was excited.

So I just continued. I have quite a few avatars on Gumroad now and I take commissions occasionally if they're interesting enough for me to do.

Throughout three years of playing VRC, I've met countless friends I never would have had the opportunity to meet otherwise. I've experienced every emotion available within that platform. It's brought me some of the best people I could have ever asked for.

"So is that all you do? You just play video games?"

I guess. VRC is more than just a video game, especially to me. It's a way for me to connect with people in an otherwise isolated world. When you've never experienced it before, it's difficult to explain it in a way that makes sense. It's just something you need to be in to understand.

It's a part of my life. It's brought me friends, money and endless entertainment. I'll forever be grateful for this medium.

"How often do you expect to talk to me?"

That depends on you and how interesting to me you can be. I can easily become obsessed with someone if they're my kind of person. Worshipping them almost.

On the opposite side of the spectrum, if you don't interest me at all, I'll be happy barely talking to you, if at all.

Rapidfire DMs are always interesting to me. Questions about myself, equally interesting.

"Is that all?"

I guess. You'll have to actually talk to me if you want to know more.