It's funny how one event can change your life so much. If my parents hadn't dumped me in that garbage pile when I was younger, I wouldn't be living in fear all the time. I wouldn't be afraid of going to work, or of being around people. I would be a normal person.

But that's not what happened. My parents did dump me, and ever since then I've been plagued by intrusive thoughts. What if they hadn't done that? What if I'd been raised normally?

I can't help but wonder what my life would be like if that one event hadn't happened. Would I be happy? Would I be successful? Would I be loved?

It's impossible to know for sure, but I like to think that things would have turned out better for me. I like to think that I would have been able to overcome the abuse and trauma I experienced in my childhood. I like to think that I would have been a strong and happy person.

But who knows. Maybe my life would have been even worse. Maybe I would have ended up in an even worse situation than I'm in now.

It's impossible to know for sure, but I can't help but wonder what might have been.