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5,990
Today is my 🍰 day!
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5 fucking years ago I made this throwaway account, and it totally changed my life. Holy shit.

I didn’t even realize it was my cake day until I logged on to check a different sub. Wish I would have realized it sooner, I would have celebrated somehow 😭

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Seriously that’s half a decade of boobs

Y’all essentially watched me grow up

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Yes; the skin is very comfortable to wear over all, I just wish it was a little less itchy. Flexible, it breathes, and it’s very tight where it needs to be.

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Watched me evolve into the beautiful, fertile flower I am today *tips fedora

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Actually just last month, my mom’s landlord said “I’m surprised playboy would hire someone with your body type” I thought she was talking about my height, and she was like “no, just back in my day they always had really busty women”. I took off the hoodie I was wearing and she was amazed lol

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It ain’t much but it’s honest work

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I’m honored I got your first freedom nut

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Tell me more about the intervening years, were you dating someone that told you to purge all your porn or something? Give me that decafinated tea ☕️

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In just 3 years I’ll be 30 🫣

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I ain’t hearing anyone out

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I feel old; yesterday I was grabbing to-go food in a college town, and was talking to the guy at the drive thru window. I was transporting some rescue dogs, so I asked him for a pup cup (but the ice cream machine was down). I told him if he has any friends looking to adopt dogs, to let me know. I forgot exactly how he worded it, but he essentially said they’re all in college and too young to have dogs/the ones that do have dogs shouldn’t. I was sitting there like “you see me with 2 dogs! Do I not look like I’m in college anymore?” If I was walking around on a campus, would I look old now? 😂😅 I see myself as 21 when I look in the mirror but I’m coming up on 30.

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Damn I was hoping to at least place Top for the Week, you must be into some fucked up shit.

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I’m honored to be part of that many throwaways; glad you’re having a good time 😎🍆

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Hahahahahah I didn’t flash my mom’s landlord, I was wearing a sports bra

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Profile updated: 3 months ago
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Posted
1 year ago