My last pregnancy, has scarred me for life. All my pregnancies have been high risk because I have Graves disease and no thyroid, and now on my last pregnancy I was also considered geriatric ( I'm 35)

I had ultrasounds every 2 weeks to monitor the baby , around 6 months they noticed increta which is where the placenta starts to grow through surrounding organs instead of staying put on the uterus wall. During birth it can cause the mother to hemorrhage. The mortality rate is high for this condition.

My high risk dr sent me in for MRI . They ruled out increta. Everything was back on track.

I was scheduled to be induced at 37 weeks, i had finished all my appointments with the high risk Dr so I went in for my last check up with my OB, got culture's done , blood work the routine checks.

He suggested to have another MRI done just to make sure he said he " didn't want to get caught with his pants down" . I agreed and had another MRI .

The day of my scheduled c section I was supposed to be there at 4pm. They called that morning and told me I needed to be there by 12pm instead.

My SO and I packed up our things and headed to the hospital. Once we arrived they put us in one of the delivery rooms to wait. My mother was on her way.

A few moments later my OB and a nurse enterd the room . He told me the results of the second MRI showed that I did in fact have increta. That they had to set up in the main OR room with a whole medical team, that I would have to have balloons but in my main arteries in my legs to help stop blood loss for when I start to hemorrhage, and that I will have to be put to sleep for the surgery.

If that wasn't upsetting enough, he went on to say there's something else, "can I speak to you with you SO in the room or would you like him to leave?" I told him i was fine with him being in the room, not having any clue.

He says " on your last culture's you came up positive for chlamydia, your first culture's in your first trimester everything was negative " .. my heart sank as I looked over at my SO he had turned ghost white. SO I confirmed " I didn't have it at the beginning of my pregnancy and now I have it" he said " that's correct, we have to start you on antibiotics before surgery to prevent infection going to the baby ". He said he would meet me in the OR room and then left the room.

I looked over at my SO he couldn't even look me in the eye. Just 2 weeks prior he had went up north to visit family for a week. There were nights he didn't call and check on me and didn't answer his phone and it all started making sense. He claimed he was drunk and he didn't know what happened .. he kept trying to contuine the lies and I told him to stop.. I told him " you are not going to ruin this day we will talk about this later " almost on cue my mother walked in the room. I had half a mind to let my mother in on what had just took place knowing they would be alone for the next several hours but I decided against it..

The same nurse that had been in the room came to pick me up and wheel me down to the OR. I said my good byes to my mother and while my mother wasn't looking flipped off my SO.

While she was wheeling me to the OR for what seemed like 10 miles I looked up at her and she was giving me the look. So I broke the ice and said " that was extremely embarrassing and I'm sorry you probably felt very awkward in there " she immediately " omg girl I'm so sorry I wanted to smack him for you" etc etc. She was also pregnant and was inraged at my SO

We got to the OR doors and they explained to me I would be awake while they insert the balloons into my arteries and the whole set up process to limit the time the baby will be exposed to the anesthesia .

As the OR doors open I was met with a medical team of 20 several OR surgens , several anesthesiologist, several OR nurses and a trauma team . It was not until this very moment did I realize how serious and how dangerous they were anticipating this to be. My anxiety immediately went through the roof.

They proceeded to move me to the cold hard OR table and put the drape up. They first had to place the balloons which I felt everything. It took them over an hour not allowed to move obviously my back was killing me st this point and I started to get panicked. I found myself trying to focus on anything other than what they were doing. I started counting tiles over and over. I kept talking to myself trying to calm myself down, but my intrusive thoughts took over about what if I never wake up, what if I die and of course going over and over again in my head of why would my SO cheat on me.. 2 weeks before our son was to be born..and unprotected !!

The anesthesiologist started putting medication into my IV, i started to hyperventilate, then started vomiting they gave me a suction ( just like at the dentist ) to use on my self and turned my head to the side. The same nurse that had wheeled me down to the OR came up by my head and told me it was about that time . She explained to me that they were going to put the gas mask on and then proceeded to say " I'm going to have to press down on your throat to get it ready for the breathing tube" . .. EXCUSE ME?!? She then started pressing down on my throat as they strapped my arms to the table and shoved the gas mask on my face I started screaming then..all I seen was red.

Surgery began at 5pm, I woke up at 12am confused and in pain. I was in a room with another woman, I could not see as the curtain had separated us. She was coughing and wheezing . The nurse walked in and I said " is she contagious ?? I just had a baby " the nurse responded " no she's dying she's in her final stages" turns out I wasnt even on the labor and delivery floor I was in ICU..

A nurse came to get me. She had took pictures of my baby for me , with half a eye open I seen the most beautiful boy I'd ever seen, hooked up to a feeding tube and oxygen... the anesthesia had gotten to him.

They wheeled me to the NICU where my baby would stay for the next week. I was able to see him for a few moments before they took me back to my room.
There waited my mother. My SO had left after I was out of surgery.

All on pain meds I cried to my mother, told her that my SO had cheated on me and have me a STI ..and my traumatic experience in the OR.. she stayed with me and didn't leave my side.

I started suffering from some extreme PPD. On my last day at the hospital I walked by the nurses station on my way to the NICU to visit my son and I hear a " hey how are you feeling" I look up and it's the nurse that choked me out. My eye started twitching and I started hyperventilating ..I just kept walking without speaking to her.. seeing her face had triggerd my trauma. Time I made it to the NICU I had calmed myself down .

One of the NICU nurses started tearing up and and said " while you were in the OR , after the baby had made it down here there was a code blue in the OR ( death ) we all prayed ..we thought it was you"

My son stayed in the NICU for 3 more days while I was forced to go home.

At my one week check up , I was getting ready to leave and my OB is just looking at me .. he wanted the tea. I said " well, he's still alive" referring to my SO. He laughed and went on to tell me how awkward that was for him that he had to deliever that news before but never right before a birth.. he said " you handled that very well, I really thought there was going to be violence " .

I learned two things from this experience..

How to forgive someone who doesn't deserve it and

What's it's like to die from being choked..

0/10 would not recommend.