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My friend is a single mom of two kids and work and live about 5 miles from her house. Iâve been helping her transition into being a single mom from her recent divorce but it has recently become overbearing and Iâve tried to say no to her more often to distance myself and make her less reliant on my help. Just last night, she texts me and asks if I could go get her and her kids some food since they were hungry and they had all showered and didnât want to leave the house that late. I said no and told them to order through postmates.
This morning she calls me and asks me what time I take my lunch. I tell her around 12 pm and she asks if I could run an errand for her at my lunch and go pick up her kids and drop them off at her momâs house. I tell her no cause Iâm taking a 30 minute lunch.
âI thought you get an hour lunch? Thatâs more than enough time to pick them up and drop them off.â She argues.
âI take a 30 minute lunch so I can go home 30 minutes early.â I reply.
âBut it wonât hurt you this once today to go home 30 minutes later.â
âI switched up my schedule and now Iâm only given 30 minutes for lunch.â I lie.
âBullshit. I only get 30 minutes. Not like you who gets an hour but chooses to only take 30 minutes. I donât get it. Why wonât you help?â She asks.
âCause I donât want to. It shouldnât matter what reason I give you.â I reply.
âBut I need your help and youâre capable of helping but youâre refusing now? Why be such an ass?â
âI mean if youâre going to call me an ass for not wanting to help you then I donât know what else to tell you. Whether I get 30 minutes or an hour for lunch, you are not entitled to my time and-â she hangs up the phone as Iâm speaking.
âI donât have time for your lecture. You can help but refuse even though it would be no problem for you. Thatâs fucked up.â She texts back.
âYouâre being very entitled right now and I donât think itâs cool to expect your friend to help even if they can. Just cause my uncle has $1,000,000 does not mean he has to pay off my car loan.â I text back.
âWhatever. Youâve changed. You no longer want to help me. You want to make me beg you. Fine be that way. Iâll ruin your life. Iâll go to your house and job and make a scene and tell them how youâre faking your disabilityâ she texts back. I am a us army veteran thatâs partial disabled from my service and since Iâm not missing a leg or in a wheelchair, she thinks she can get me arrested for fraud.
I havenât answered her since but I think sheâs bluffing and blowing this way out of proportion. But am I wrong for refusing to help her even though Iâm not than capable? I keep second guessing myself here so I feel conflicted.
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