i posted this on instagram so i’m just copy pasting the text:

i leave my rehab program july 15th and i’m struggling because i need to make 3.5k by then to get a van to live out of and possibly drive back to new mexico. i came here to work on my mental health, gender stuff, disordered eating, and addictions (self harm, sex, etc) but somehow shits gotten worse but also better. rehab has made me even more su!c!dal than i was before i came in here. i feel hopeless and alone so ive been sleeping with people i meet online to give myself the illusion that someone loves me. the best i can get out of that is recording it and trying to make money off of it but there’s so much wrong there bc i had top surgery and it’s a very small audience for ftm/nonbinary people. i feel like my life is a shitshow and i want it to end so so bad. like rn. i hate doing this but if you’d be so kind: cashapp: $gothkreep venmo: bearspiracy paypal: interstellarclouds