It’s that time again when I sit with a scotch in hand 🥃 and think about the year I've had and the one ahead.

And I’m suddenly hit with a strong sense of nostalgia. I just feel really sad, can’t say why. At a time of year when there’s an awful lot going on and I can’t afford to be like this. But I’m okay, promise, so don’t send any mental health links, heh 😅

I’m thinking partly of GWA and what it means to me. Two short years that feel like a lifetime. Remembering all the people I’ve met, from the “early days of 2020”. It’s hard to sustain friendships when I disappear for stretches, or people come and go, but my life is what it is. Of course I feel sad.

And I’m thinking of my real life, too. Nostalgia is such a weird emotion - that wistful, happy sad feeling that you can’t pinpoint exactly. Sometimes it’s just a smell. A particular lemon scent 🍋 can unlock a flood of memories for me but I don’t think it’s a specific moment or event, rather, a period in my life that I was happiest. Just a vision of clothes drying out in the wind. Or the cool breeze on my face, conjuring up flashbacks to my very early childhood, lying on the floor by the open window while my Mum was busy with housework or something. Maybe just the feeling that she’s always near.

It’s evening here as I’m writing. When the sky still has that soft, peachy light before it all fades to black. Maybe it’s this time of day that’s making me nostalgic. It holds so many secrets yet the closest I come to unravelling them is an aching in my heart. I must’ve had so many great evenings, my mind can’t recall but my heart sure does.

What’s your favorite time of day? As an introvert, I would say mine is the night 🌙. It’s not about being loud or quiet. I get exhausted rapidly when interacting with people all day and I recover energy by channelling inwards, while extroverts become energized when interacting with people. Of course, nobody is exclusively either or, we all fall somewhere on the spectrum. Like how the Sims have a “needs meter” - my alone time meter drains rapidly, while my social meter takes longer.

In my 20s, though, I loved the nights for the completely opposite reason. I didn’t spend so much time thinking back then. It was always do stuff, go places, try new things. Man, I loved it. I miss it.

I’m definitely not a morning person, but there was a time when my work required an early start and because of that, I’ve also come to love mornings ☀️. It’s hard to say why, because it’s not one thing but a mix of little joys - the smell of coffee, that well-rested feeling, the anticipation of starting a new adventure, that unshakable optimism.

So that leaves afternoons. Oh god, not that dreadful mid-afternoon slump. But, thinking for a moment, I have had some awesome afternoons, too. I remember one such afternoon out on the open sea on rented jet skis. 🌊 The waves were choppy, and there was a storm brewing on the horizon but far enough not to concern us yet. And there we were, bunch of friends and I, having a grand old time. We packed food and beers and rode up to a nearby beach for a BBQ. Side note - jet ski storage compartments aren’t watertight though, so unless you like drying out your smokes on a rock, better seal them in plastic. 😂

God, it’s been so long since I had a holiday like that. Or friends like that, for that matter. We’re all grown up now, some with kids, some far away, but all of us, I’m sure, thankful to have had such good days. Maybe I need to shake off this sadness, and be thankful for my little blessings, huh? The past few months for me were filled with days that were chaotic, magical, surreal, crazy, intense, amazing - days I’ll treasure forever.

So, someone, please give me a swift kick up my butt and say, “Get back to it, Taurean!” I’d love you for it. And to you reading this, whoever you are, I’m wishing you all the happiness and all the good things for the new year. Be kind and patient with everyone, but above all, with yourself. Your best days are still ahead, my friend 🧡

So, I'm going on another break. I’ll mostly be offline and may not reply (but I’ll always pop in to leave a comment on any script fill). I'll release some scripts for V-day and if the stars align, return again with more exciting stories sometime March. Or September. Stars are finicky things.