Ok. I haven't watched it but apparently it must have done well bc I saw a pop up on my screen that said there's a new one? So now I feel compelled to waste brain cells and watch it. Maybe I'll understand the cougar-cub dynamic better? Bc my experience thus far with cubs is, yea, def not my vibe whatsoever. Too dramatic, haven't learned how to be a gentleman, zero effort made, just dtf. 🤮 Finding men in their 40s who take care of themselves is difficult. This whole "dad bod" vibe is not cute. Why do I put in thousands of dollars and hours every month to at least try when no one else tries? Cubs are hot bc they've got the bods. Either they try or it's their young metabolism but we are on two totally different planes of existence. I don't want kids, I want to travel first-class, not couch surf or sleep in a tent, I want to go to resorts, gamble, buy my high-end luxury sports cars and mod them out. I need to find an immature middle-aged guy (the male version of me) that has his ish together or a cub that's ready for the things I want and can financially keep up or surpass me. I'm totally willing to support an ambitious cub who's marriage-minded and actually has high-potiental and a high-emotional intelligence. Lowkey, that's kinda what I'm constantly seeking but at this point, I think I'm wasting my time. So I'm just stuck. Can't find anyone my age I'm attracted to physically can't find a cub on the same level. This all keeps me very single. I do enjoy the stress-free existence though. Zero drama in my life. My block game is strong lol. My gift of goodbye is getting a bit better but I'm finding myself wanting closure on some lingering FWB situations. Once I physically am with someone, I feel like I'm attaching. I do not want that but I haven't figured out how not to attach. So I'm going to start making my attachment issue part of my Dread Talk. My Dread Talk is my open & honest list of things wrong with me. I believe in allowing men to make informed decisions about getting involved with me. I wish there was room in my profile to just list them. I added a few but there are 4 things I reveal before meeting anyone. I doubt anyone will read this but I'll just list them here. 1. I was raped at 11 and given HSV2. 80-90% of the population has HSV. If you've ever had a cold sore (aka a fever blister) on your mouth, that's HSV. There are 2 types. 1&2. You can have both, either/or. Some people get it at birth. It's controlled for me by meds and I've never spread it. I've been married and had 3 kids, zero issues. I'm lucky. I have a problem about every 5 years for about 2 days and I know beforehand. 2. I had breast cancer. My tits are scarred and ugly. 3. My ex-husband shattered my leg in a DV incident and I have a scar below my knee. 4. I have cellulite and loose skin now which I've never had before. It's not pretty and I hate it SO much. Doing what I can before surgery is my final option. Which I think I'm at that point. 5. My new one, I attach once I have sex. So using and ghosting me is extremely painful for me. I attempt to mitigate that by vetting men but it still happens. I block at the first sign of a red flag. Thank you for coming to my Dread Talk.