I may or may not post this to an official BDSM personals subreddit, but here's what I'm currently in the market for since I get a few unsolicated DMs. I’m not eager looking right now as I process and revise.

I have met some truly incredible folks on here so if you see me in different subs feel free to say hello - just note that I am not likely to interact with anyone 24 and under, married or attached, looking for strictly Ds. I'm going to ask about these off the bat because they are disqualifying. If I don’t respond it’s because something in your message or history lead me to believe you were in one of these situations.

What I'm Seeking

I am an experienced dominant lady seeking a self-aware, articulate submissive to build a lifelong female led relationship. I'm dating for marriage, folks. I'm not looking for my sub, I'm looking for my husband (or wife) who happens to be submissive. I have been happy in monogamous and polyamorous relationship styles. You know that buzzy feeling when your phone lights up with their name or feeling your stomach turn over when they walk into a room - that's what I'm after. Location isn't critical, let's start online and then allow this to spill out into the real world as fast as makes sense.

I have a somewhat anxious attachment style which manifests in a desire to connect frequently. I will want to hear your voice daily. I will want to see you often and touch you more. When I'm really taken with you I get obsessive and then demanding while still prioritizing kindness and nurturing.

I have been living this lifestyle for a pretty long time. I have a warm and funny personality that can often seem unexpected or jarring when compared to my kinks. My dominance and sadism are principally motivated by affection - meaning the more I care about my partner, the more my desire to control various aspects of their lives. I can have fun with short-term and throwaway experiences but they are very surface level so it gets boring fast. I love building my connection with my partner so our kink play is built on a foundation of mutual attraction and respect.

My kinks

I have a kink list as long as my arm and they fall in and out of rotation but my favorites tend to stem from role reversal, control, humiliation, and sadism. My favorites include body worship, erotic breastfeeding, crossdressing and feminization/bimbofication, orgasm control/tease and denial and chastity, lifestyle control, painplay (particularly cbt and spanking), cuckoldry and forced bi, pegging, and a whole lot more. I enjoy both sexual and non-sexual expressions of kink. I value sacrifice but I also enjoy a partner who feels at home within their desire to submit and embraces my guidance and training. I love the process of shaping my sub and nudging their limits and interests so they are in line with my own.

More about me

Outside of kink, I am a voluptuous bisexual black woman in my mid 30's. I have a few extra pounds I'm working on losing and I'm discovering more movement-focused hobbies. I have a career I love and takes up a fair amount of my time. In my free time, I am an avid reader, passionate about live music and cultural experiences. I have never met a musical comedy I didn't love, I am learning to sew and spend way too much time binging true crime docs.

Who I am looking for

I am looking for a smart, funny, charmer /- my age by ten years whose kinks and vanilla interests align with my own. I would love if you had most of your life together and can regulate your emotions. I am bi and both cis and trans folks are welcome to reach out. I have a soft spot for the clingy types, even if it takes a while to unlock that particular character trait. I value honesty and communication above all else. I am looking for someone confident in their desire to submit to another. I tend to pour a lot of myself into my relationships so I am looking for someone who has the time and energy to match my contribution.

Listen friends, we all browse this subreddit when we're that right mix of horny, lonely, and kinky and it's scary being vulnerable in this way but please show up as your authentic self because I know I will be.

TL;DR

Experienced bisexual domme seeks kinky, cling, and sweet submissive ebby, lady or gent for new sexy adventures, marriage and (maybe) kiddos.